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Friendships That Matter

I recently read an article by John Ortberg entitled, “Higher Stakes Friendships.” He talked about these so called “five rules of friendship” this group of guys used as guidelines for their conversations. The “five rules” were…

1. We can ask anything, no holds barred.
2. If you answer, you must tell the truth, as much as you know it.
3. If you don’t answer, you must say why you won’t or can’t answer.
4. Everything that is said to each other will be held in absolute confidence.
5. We will make absolutely no judgments of each other.

I like these “five rules.” The only thing I might add is to number 5. While we won’t make any judgments of each other we will speak truth into one another’s lives.

You know, I’m humbled and thankful to be able to say that I actually have a handful of people in my life that I can and do have these kind of conversations with.

Having someone you can call at 3am….matters.

Having someone that can look you in the eye and tell you you’ve absolutely lost your flippin’ mind…matters.

Having someone who’s there on your way up and they’re just as close on the way down…matters.

So my encouragement to you is don’t settle for anything less than deep relationships that…matter.

Mindlessly Moving Through Life

Mindlessly doing things because all our friends do them is pretty much 90 percent of what society does. Sad, but true. It started in elementary school, raged in high school and unfortunately followed us right into adulthood.

This interesting article I read talks about how our eating habits are formed by those we eat with most often. The article was pointing to a principle I’ve found true most of my life. My physical habits, spiritual methods and thought patterns are often influenced by the people I hang out with more than I would like to admit.

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised by this, 1 Corinthian 15:33 says, “Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.”

Not exactly sure how I balance this with personal evangelism and the time I spend with people in my life whose lives are not where they should be. However, I think the warning is simple. Be very careful who you allow into the inner circle of your life and whatever you do don’t just mindlessly adopt the thoughts, actions, and patterns of the people around you.

Are the people in your “inner circle” helping guide you to become the person God designed you to be?

Stuff Christians Like (For Christmas)

I love Jon Acuff. Even when he wishes our church was more traditional I still love him.

He’s not only a good friend, but there is no doubt in my mind that he’s one of the funniest people I’ve ever met.

I wanted to tell you guys about another one of his brilliant ideas. You can now buy your own Stuff Christians Like Daily Desk Calendar!

Each day contains a remix of one of the best posts from the site, including “Serious Wednesdays.”

I’m a big believer that we should laugh a lot more. Especially at ourselves and I can’t think of a better way for you to make sure that happens consistently than to pick up one of the calendars.

He promises it’s 100% easier to finish than your read-through-the-Bible-in-one-year plan and 77% funnier than the book of Deuteronomy (but then again he wants hand bells for Christmas and you can never trust a dude that likes hand bells).

They only printed a limited number so make sure you grab one soon. You can order yours RIGHT HERE.

Deal of the Day (and no lines)

Tiffany ep cover

In honor of Black Friday I thought it would be fitting today to let you know about a great deal. My friend Tiffany Thurston just released her second EP, a snapshot of what you can expect from her full-length album to be released in 2012, and I’m so excited for you guys to check it out. In addition to touring throughout the year with Women of Faith and Natalie Grant, Tiffany is one of the amazing worship leaders at Cross Point and we’re so lucky to know her.

Tiffany’s spirit for Christ is evident in everything she does and there’s no mistaking what she seeks in this life; for Jesus’ name to be made bigger and brighter. Tiffany is a super talented songwriter and artist originally from Hawaii and I highly encourage you today to get in on this treat. Snag copies for yourself, friends and loved ones this Christmas. At $2.97 you really can’t beat it. :)

Today only, I’m giving away 5 free digital copies along with, thanks to Tiffany’s generosity,  5 free Hello Somebody watches tying into the theme of one of her tunes called “Wake Up.”

If you’re not familiar with Hello Somebody, they’re a great organization literally changing hundreds of lives every day through their mission to feed and educate children in order to break the cycle of hunger and poverty within their generation. When you purchase a Hello Somebody product you invest directly into the lives of these children and this mission. They also have a couple of way cool Black Friday package deals you can check out here.

If you’d like to be included in the drawing leave your name and where you’re from in the comments and let us know if you braved the Black Friday crowds or decided to stay away from the madness!

55 ways to be creative

So here it is guys. Last week I did a post entitled “10 Proven Ways To Be More Creative“. At the end of the post I challenged you guys to add to the list and now I’m happy to introduce you to the “55 Proven Ways To Be More Creative”. Thanks to all of you for sharing your ideas.

You’ll see that several people allowed us to link to their sites or blogs. Please take a minute to check them out. It will be a great way for you to make a new friend or a new online inspiration.

1) Try a different way of expressing your ideas. If you usually work on your computer, try writing by hand. If you usually work with dot-points, try mind mapping. Maybe you could try poetry rather than prose. – Joanna

2) Get in a room with a friend (or over a lunch table). -Chrisy

3) Find one thing you don’t normally do, then do it. Being creative is about getting outside the human need to be scheduled. -Cheryl Derrick

4) Seriously … I get into the kitchen and either cook or bake. Making a dish or a dessert, without interruptions or time pressure, gives me the chance to be creative in a different way than I usually am. -Melissa

5) I truly believe writing in a daily journal allows us an outlet to be creative. A gratitude journal has changed my perception on what I feel grateful for in a given day. -Shayne

6) I always find my creative juices flowing when I surrounded myself with all things creative – whether it’s simply browsing through a store or going to a demonstration, craft show, writing workshop, etc. -Beth

7) I’m a strong believer in coloring my way through writer’s block, or anything else that needs to have my creative juices flowing, yet is met with a blockage. There is just something very relaxing and freeing about grabbing a coloring book and some crayons and really getting into the process! -Heather Bittner

8) Starting with a completely blank slate helps me get creative. Whether it’s a message or a graphic piece, looking at a completely blank document or “canvas” forces me to think about the endless possibilities that can come from where there is originally nothing. -Dan

9) Get a new perspective by working in a new environment. Take your laptop to a library, coffee shop or even a park where you’ve never been. I recently just drove the beltway and some side streets of our city where I’ve never been and just prayed for the city. You see things from a whole new perspective. The creative juices flowed in rivers!  -Scott

10) I’m not sure why, but my best story ideas seem to pop up when I’m blow drying my hair. Fresh air does it for me too. We all spend so much time indoors working – especially as a writer, I’m at my computer waaaaay too much. So when I step out on the back porch or just take a walk and breathe in that fresh air – oh baby. LOVE that. -Diane

11) I listen to music or spoken word or even a pod-cast that stimulates my thinking… it is especially helpful to listen to people with differing theologies, ideologies, or political perspective because that causes my mind to truly think instead of simply absorb and regurgitate another person’s ideas. -Jeff

12) I visit the local Goodwill store. There’s usually a good number of interesting chotchkes on the sales floor, and I always find something that’ll get my creative juices flowing. -Nigel

13) Go crazy. Go out and have some fun that’s different from what you normally do. My daughter and I just took a road trip, stopping at all the quirkiest places along our route. We had a blast and it shook up some new ideas.           -Laura

14) Jon Acuff had a great point this week. I seem to get more creative in the shower, but as he said, it’s not the environment… it’s the one place where you can have complete solitude without interruptions or distractions. So, I guess quiet solitude where you can focus on your thoughts. -Russ

15) Spend some time in a park or on your back porch. Nothing helps me get to a creative place better than some solitude in the open air with just the sounds of nature and life. -Randy Frye

16) Take a walk and imagine the world around you through the eyes of the people you see. In the park, imagine what the little boy on the slide is experiencing.. or the guys playing ultimate frisbee. This takes you out of your own mind set and preconceptions and gives you new ground to stand on for a while. -Stacie

17)  When I seek intimacy with my Creator, then He gives me creativity, not as an end, but as a gift of the relationship.   -Gary

18) Running/exercising.   I work in a creative field and whenever I need to come up with a fresh idea, I go for a run and almost always have a solution to put on my client’s/boss’s desk. -Christina

19) To jumpstart my creative drive, I open myself up to questions I’m afraid or don’t know how to answer. Always be a learner. -Jake

20) Be fearless -Gerard

21) Surround myself regularly with people who inspire me and with whom I can brainstorm with. Nothing like multiple creative people to inspire days of ideas!   -Paula

22) Any time I get to spend outside gets me feeling creative, but recently my girl friends and I have been really excited about Pinterest. We love pinning all sorts of things we have created ourselves and stuff that we want to do in the future.  -Natalie

23) Get in a room with 3 or 4 other like-minded people and bounce ideas off each other. Oh and remember what Maxwell says “let the best idea win.” collective collaboration. -Brian

24) Being around young children opens up my creativity quite often. They have boundless energy and don’t box me in! -Bluegoose

25) Go on blog-stalking hiatus for 30 days. When you come back, ONLY follow blogs that inspire. Such a great way to get perspective and spend time understanding your own creativity instead of someone else’s. -Katie

26) Espresso, hands down!! -Brenda

27) If you drive to work (as opposed to working from home), go a COMPLETELY different way to work, and leave AT LEAST 30 minutes before you need to so you can slow down and enjoy some scenery on your drive. If you work from home, get up and get out of the house and back to your house BEFORE your work day starts.   Then, wave to at least 5 people while you’re driving, and offer them a smile. You’d be surprised, but it works wonders… -Jason

28) I love talking walks & stopping at various places to read. I also love reading Psalms. When I dive in a phrases typically capture my imagination. -Michael

29) Do something that scares you; something you are completely unsure of (probably risky). It always results in me becoming more receptive to inspiration and it breaks down mental barriers. -PJ

30) One thing that helps me be creative is being a dad. I am constantly being inspired by my three daughters. -Kevin

31) I journal. 1) a pen is cheap therapy and 2) always write something everyday.  . -Marni

32)  Take yourself on a date to a movie. Just you. Totally different experience than going with someone. -Evie

33) Express your creativity in a different, unfamiliar form. E.g. if you’re a writer, get paint and brushes and tell the story in colors rather than words. If you’re a musician, shoot a short film/sculpt some clay. If you’re multilingual, it helps to work in another language, too — preferably one you aren’t very fluent in. -Sharon

34) I love to “people watch” so a good quirky coffee shop helps me get a little bit outside of myself and and helps me think from different angles.  -Melissa

35) See what other people are doing…then figure out how to make the ideas that resonate with you work for you. Or take those ideas to the next level. For me, this is what blogs, Tumblr, and Twitter are all about.   -TJ

36) Being around children sparks my creativity because they are so full of ideas, joy for life and little inhibitions about the world.   -Dana Tallman

37) Small changes in everyday habits can open your brain. Brush your teeth with the opposite hand. It’s going to make your brain engage in new ways to process familiar tasks. -Laura

38) I take pictures of everyday stuff, like leftover spaghetti, or a scrubbie that came apart, and write a story to go with it.   -Lynna

39) I have not really done this, but I would like to. Try to surround your self with beautiful things. I seem to find when I am blessed by noticing something beautiful here and there it seems to spur me. Would love to cultivate that. -Jason

40) Have a “ME” day.   Take sometime to be alone. When you do this your creative side can’t help, but let loose. It is hard to be ourselves and be creative with all the noise in our lives.   -Amelia

41) Make a list of 100 questions – Usually questions mean we are looking for a solution, i.e. idea, concept. By making a list of questions, you exercise curiosity and an inquisitive part of your brain that may have been asleep for a while. By forcing yourself to ask 100 questions, you may find there are more questions and the more the merrier. Wake up your curiosity. -Jon

42) Exposure to Good Art. Usually visual art, but this can apply to film, theatre, and literature. once I get curious, creativity comes in floods, not just a stream. -Lisa

43) Talk to me wife.  Creativity can be taught. My wife has been an art teacher for 27 years and has been teaching her students to be creative during that time. It is possible to learn skills that produce creativity… seriously. - Leland

44) Open the dictionary (a real, tangible, paper copy) to a random page. Without looking or thinking point to a word. Read the definition and begin writing. Not thinking and trying to write. Just write for 60 seconds or so and see what comes of it.  . -Tiffanie

45) Replace thinking about starting with actually starting. This is by far the creative step I wrestle with the most. -Greg

46) Write a poem with a definite rhyme scheme, or a meaningful haiku. -Zach

47) Make time to be creative and follow through. Make an appointment with yourself if you have to. If we wait until we feel it, it won’t happen. Discipline us a huge part of creativity for me. -Tressa

48) Push back from the computer and go do something else for awhile while letting yourself mull things over. For me, doing some housework or going for a run while I let my thoughts skip around on something can spark an idea that gets things flowing again. -Michelle

49)  I have the greatest trouble with: Acknowledging that the unique strengths that God prepared me with can result in creating something that no one else can. Sometimes we can all forget that we are equipped to do something unique; we need to remember that and allow it to happen. -Steve

50) Go back to basics. do things by hand. -Anne

51) I’m a Pastor/Communicator, so for being creative in message prep, every once in a while I like to walk through the local Home Depot or hardware store, looking at all the different items and in 30 secs or less determining how that item will preach (illustrate a spiritual principle).   -Jeremy

52) I start with a marker, a blank slate – big piece of paper, or a dry erase board, or whatever – and my current favorite album (has to be headphones, not speakers – block out everything else). Depending on how much time I have, I set a limit – no talking, no other ideas, for 30 minutes or so. Write whatever concept/idea/goal I have in the middle, and start writing/doodling whatever comes to mind without thinking about any of it too much.  . -Lex

53) Defending my family championship belt by wrestling with one of my kids helps me. Something about humiliating small children that gets my creative juices flowing. -Jason

54) Take a nap. A power nap always increases my creativity.

55) Read a list of 55 different ways to be creative. If none of these inspire you to be creative than you should probably stop trying to be creative today. Do something else. Try to be creative tomorrow. :)

The Best 99¢ You’ll Spend Today

I know I’ve introduced you guys to a lot of new books but I’ve just stumbled on a lot of good ones lately. Today I want to tell you about a good friend of mine and his book that just released.

Ken Moody has been a friend of mine and Cross Point since we started. He’s currently serving his second term as an elder and he’s truly helped shape parts of our culture over the years. He’s written a great novel entitled Ordained Irreverence.

One of my favorite people ever, Tom Tyndall, who retired from Cross Point a while back had this to say about the book:

Yes, Moody tells a delightful laugh-out-loud read that draws you in if only to see what happens next to the characters! Moody’s sobering yet very wryly written upbeat look at pastoral ministry should be required reading for pastors. Knowing Moody personally, he’s not mean-spirited nor hokey, yet he reveals personal stories, helpful insights, even tough questions that every pastor or church worker faces sooner or later. Moody also cleverly weaves romance, church stunts, staff dynamics and dysfunctional meetings in a hopeful way that features a compelling cast of true church “characters.” While, like this pastor-reviewer, you may still wonder at what “ordination” means, you’ll appreciate those who genuinely want to make a difference in lives through finding their usefulness to God in “church work.”

I asked Ken to share a few more thoughts about his new book and the process by which he wrote it.

1. What made you want to write this book?

Having spent a large portion of my adult life as a church staff member I wanted to canonize some of the more humorous episodes from my “days of the cloth.” I chose to make it a novel so I could, using artistic license, vamp off the real stories making them a bit more colorful. I also reasoned that by taking the fiction route I could greatly decrease the chance of a disgruntled church member waiting for me at my car with hatchet in hand.

2. I know you’ve spent a lot of time on church staff. Is the book in any way based on real life characters or experiences from your past?

I like saying that my book was “inspired” by my own personal experiences, those of my friends in ministry, and all of the wonderful and oft-time quirky people we ministered to. Real life is always funnier than anything we can contrive, and life is funniest when it catches us off guard, surprises us, or breaks us out of our ordinary routines. This seems to happen a lot in church work.

3. There are a lot of aspiring authors who read the blog. Tell us a little bit about your writing process. Any tips for those of us wanting to improve our art of writing?

Even though I walk, talk, and eat at a rapid pace, when it comes to writing I slow it way down. I like to savor the words and phrases, letting them wash around in my mind, patiently waiting for the nuances and the subtleties to emerge

Writing for me always starts with a great idea. Not just the idea for your whole book, but the idea for each scene, each interchange between characters. Once you have a firm grasp of the idea, then it’s easier to let the narrative and the dialogue write themselves. Then go back to each word and sentence and ask:

How can I make this stronger?

Is there a better word or phrase I could use?

Oh yeah, it’s a pain, but it’s also a lot of fun.

Writing, for me is like jogging, it’s always hard work and I have to push myself to do it. Yet when the run is over I’m glad I did it.

So thanks for joining us Ken and thanks for writing such a fun book. And I want add that you guys should do yourself a huge favor, forget about the 99 cent fries and order Ordained Irreverence by CLICKING  HERE if you want to start reading the book right now.

And just for fun. What’s one other thing you could purchase for 99¢ today?

Ted Dekker on Creativity, Dance, and Imagination

Hands down “STORY” is one of the most creative, challenging and all around most exciting conferences out there. The theme for 2011 is IMAGINE NATION which speaks to the power of spiritual imagination. In Exodus 35, the artist of Israel came together to build a dwelling place for God. They carved poles, fashioned gold, and constructed curtains “with cherubim woven into them by expert hands.” The job of these artists was to envision the Kindgom and use their gifts to heighten peoples spiritual imaginations. An Imagine Nation.

Join a tribe of creative artists attempting to learn more about their craft, story telling, and imagination. One of the story tellers at STORY this year is NY Times best-selling author Ted Dekker.  Dekker’s novels have sold over 5 million copies worldwide and I’m excited to share this interview we did with Ted.

1. What is your best personal definition of a STORY?

A story is an exploration, a clawing at the cracked earth of my experiences in search of a well of life that’s buried somewhere below the surface.

2. What is one way you have found to grow or engage your imagination?

Experiences. I write to explore and discover so I go in search of life. I immerse myself in living because it’s out of that that story emerges.

3. In your experience what is the best nontraditional form or STORY telling you have seen, heard, or experienced?

I don’t know if it’s non-traditional, but I would say dance. No doubt about it. It is one of the purest forms of expression that can communicate humanity in truly unexpected ways. It moves me like nothing else can.

4. If you could encourage a creative person with one tip on being imaginative what would you tell them?

Be fully awake and pay attention. The most imaginative people in the world simply observe life more closely than everyone else and are willing to ask honest questions.

5. What is one thing you are excited about sharing with the tribes attending STORY 2011?

I’m most excited about encouraging them to discover life through their art by telling the truth. A lot of art created today, particularly by people of faith, borders on propaganda. It’s created with an agenda in mind other than telling the truth.

If you’re a writer, filmmaker, artist, performer, entrepreneur, church leader, communicator, or other type of creative, you won’t want to miss STORY 2011.To register, visit HERE or if you need a little more information visit the STORY site.

So we asked this question to Ted but I would love to get your thoughts…

If you could encourage a creative person with one tip what would it be?

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