Like many of you, surprised doesn’t even being to describe how I felt when I read John Piper’s announcement that he would be stepping down from his position at Bethlehem Church to spend the next 8 months working on his marriage.

I’ll be honest, I’ve never actually listened to an entire message from John Piper (I know some of you now doubt my salvation) but I did read Don’t Waste Your Life and When I Don’t Desire God. But regardless of how great of a preacher he may be I believe he’s embarking on the most important message he’s ever preached.  I know there are thousands of pastors (many of them young) who admire Dr. Piper and his ministry. They have a huge respect for him and watch his every move. Here’s a bit from his letter…

But on the other hand, I see several species of pride in my soul that, while they may not rise to the level of disqualifying me for ministry, grieve me, and have taken a toll on my relationship with Noël and others who are dear to me. How do I apologize to you, not for a specific deed, but for ongoing character flaws, and their effects on everybody? I’ll say it now, and no doubt will say it again, I’m sorry. Since I don’t have just one deed to point to, I simply ask for a spirit of forgiveness; and I give you as much assurance as I can that I am not making peace, but war, with my own sins.

Noël and I are rock solid in our commitment to each other, and there is no whiff of unfaithfulness on either side. But, as I told the elders, “rock solid” is not always an emotionally satisfying metaphor, especially to a woman. A rock is not the best image of a woman’s tender companion. In other words, the precious garden of my home needs tending. I want to say to Noël that she is precious to me in a way that, at this point in our 41-year pilgrimage, can be said best by stepping back for a season from virtually all public commitments.

The difference between this leave and the sabbatical I took four years ago is that I wrote a book on that sabbatical (What Jesus Demands from the World). In 30 years, I have never let go of the passion for public productivity. In this leave, I intend to let go of all of it. No book-writing. No sermon preparation or preaching. No blogging. No Twitter. No articles. No reports. No papers. And no speaking engagements.”

I got a bit of a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach when I read “In 30 years, I have never let go of the passion for public productivity.”  Those words cut me deeply because they echo the words of my own heart. I make no bones about it that I often struggle with an addiction to public productivity.

In so many ways  I’ve regretfully in different seasons communicated that building a great church is more important than investing in my family. I’ve had to go back and ask for their forgiveness each time.  It’s easy to do because…

We live in a culture (including the church) that values and even demands public productivity while downplaying and often all together ignoring personal introspection.

This addiction to “Public Productivity” is strong. Just think, most of us get quite a few accolades for the hard work we put in at the office. When I work 15 hour day I often feel a great sense of accomplishment. I love the high risk decisions, the writing under pressure, and the raw excitement of ministry. In fact, being loved for public productivity can be exhilarating and addictive. It feeds my ego. This is why so many people end up with an inflated ego and a deflated family.

We’re praying for you here, Dr. Piper. Thank you for making this courageous decision to focus on tending the “precious gardens of your family.”

You not preaching will be the most powerful message you’ve ever preached.

Ever feel an addictive allure to “Public Productivity?”