Do You Want To Lead or Boss People?
I saw a tweet the other day from Tony Morgan which linked to this POST. It included the following quote:
The boss drives group members; the leader coaches them.
The boss depends upon authority; the leader on good will.
The boss inspires fear; the leader inspires enthusiasm.
The boss says ‘I’; the leader says ‘we.’
The boss assigns the task, the leader sets the pace.
The boss says, ‘Get there on time’; the leader gets there ahead of time.
The boss fixes the blame for the breakdown; the leader fixes the breakdown.
The boss knows how it is done; the leader shows how.
The boss makes work a drudgery; the leader makes it a game.
The boss says, ‘Go’; the leader says, ‘Let’s go.’– Author unknown
The reality is we all have positional authority. You’re the pastor. You’re the boss. You’re the mother. You’re the husband. You’re the board member. You’re the deacon.
And you know what? Truth be told you can get a lot of things done through positional authority. However, I’ve discovered you usually leave people feeling…
unneeded
unmotivated
unloved.
Take a look at the quote above. Is there an area you need to be less boss and more leader?
20 Comments:
The best leaders are compelled by the desire to see others succeed. My observation, anyway.
katdish´s last blog ..The Root of Kindness
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JD in Canada Reply:
February 25th, 2010 at 8:33 am
Beautifully said, katdish!
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Pete Wilson Reply:
February 25th, 2010 at 8:37 am
Love that!
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katdish
8:25 am
I am going to be honest: The boss says, ‘Go’; the leader says, ‘Let’s go.’
This is probably the one that I have struggled with the most as a young leader. I have learned the hard way when it comes to this. Thanks again Pete…Great Stuff…
Michael´s last blog ..LT, Brian Westbrook, and Our Reltionship With God
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Michael
8:26 am
Parenting immediately comes to mind.
Ouch.
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Michael Reply:
February 25th, 2010 at 9:08 am
So parenting didn’t come to mind until you posted that…ouch…
Michael´s last blog ..LT, Brian Westbrook, and Our Reltionship With God
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Nick Reply:
February 25th, 2010 at 11:27 am
I agree.
Nick´s last blog ..No I am Not Pedophile Pastor Nicholas Carnes
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Dave Wilson
9:05 am
I’m discovering that bosses wield power, leaders empower others. And I’m learning what it looks like to be the empowerer.
Amanda Sims´s last blog ..Getting Free
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Amanda Sims
10:08 am
Good stuff Pete.
I would say “the boss depends on authority, the leader on trust”
When you live & lead in a way that inspires confidence from others they will trust you with real authority. They will give you permission to lead, & I would rather have permission to lead others as opposed to simply having the position or power to lead/boss.
Great post
Matt Bowman´s last blog ..
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Pete Wilson Reply:
February 25th, 2010 at 2:25 pm
I like that distinction between authority and trust.
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Matt Bowman
10:26 am
wow…I hate that my answer to this question is YES!!! (can I be both?)
tracy´s last blog ..
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tracy
10:30 am
Good stuff to think about… I want to lead people not just boss them around.
Becky´s last blog ..Picture Time
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Becky
10:41 am
So true. I get frustrated with those convinced they are “gifted” in the area of leadership, when they’re really just bossy and opinionated. Not the same thing. (Uh, and a few of these also applied to me…)
Leslie´s last blog ..An instructed tongue?
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Leslie
11:06 am
As always Pete, a great challenge here! This is the one that I most identified with: The boss drives group members; the leader coaches them. I need to do a lot more coaching!
Kevin M.´s last blog ..Three ways to find rest when you really need it
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Kevin M.
11:20 am
I have to agree with Dave Wilson, with parenting:
I feel like I am a better leader to others than I am a leader of my kids. At times I resort to being “boss” with them rather than “leader.” However, on the other hand, I think my kids help me become a better leader. Having to lead 3 kids that don’t fully comprehend or “know why” forces me to approach them in new and different ways, which becomes transferable.
Nick´s last blog ..No I am Not Pedophile Pastor Nicholas Carnes
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Dave Wilson Reply:
February 25th, 2010 at 1:05 pm
I ran across this N.T. Wright quote during lunch as I prepared for my small group meeting tonight:
The parents’ duty is to live out the gospel to the child: that is, to assure their children that they are loved and accepted and valued for who they are, not for who they ought to be, should have been, or might (if only they would try a little harder) become. Obedience must never be made the condition of parental ‘love’: a ‘love’ so conditioned would not deserve the name.
Dave Wilson´s last blog ..Should T-Pain replace Katie Couric? Aren’t I too old to know who T-Pain is?
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Nick
11:31 am
I think this is what all of us want…but I struggle with how to do it. call it inexperience, immaturity, or lack of self confidence…but for me these are easy to understand as concepts on a blog…hard to practice as principles in the in workplace.
I struggle with how to do it in any given situation
[Reply]
Jason
1:59 pm
Pete, this is the most accurate post I’ve seen on here. (asside from the cats going to hell)
I think younger generations are learning this the hard way, from bosses. We’ve learned how to be a leader and not a tyrant because we have worked for some who are stuck in an authoritarian type of mentality.
It’s very sad when seen in ministry especially.
Great post. Keep doin’ what you do man!!
Aaron Reddin´s last blog ..Throwback Thursday – If this doesn’t make your day, we can’t be friends
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Aaron Reddin
3:04 pm
Christ immediately comes to mind
In His love
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Pete Wilson Reply:
February 26th, 2010 at 6:48 am
No doubt.
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Bonnie Abernathy
4:25 pm
Never thought I was a leader/boss, until you mentioned parenting.
All the leadership traits are also “good parenting” traits. Which I usually have. But, sometimes, the only thing that works with my kids is a good bossing around.
Rachel´s last blog ..Unconscious Mutterings
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Rachel
6:18 pm
Well, huh! Now that you put it that way, I would say that I am more boss than leader as a mom. I just never realized it until I read this. All I could have told you prior to 5 min. ago was that I wasn’t getting nearly the results I wanted to get, but I wasn’t sure why. This has kind of opened my eyes.
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Jan
8:27 pm
For a Christian, whether a pastor, father, husband, boss, employee, friend, etc, there is only one element that makes true leadership: being a servant of all. Mark 9:23
When we master this, authority will be given to us from heaven and souls will be won for the Kingdom.
But you are not to be called “Rabbi”, for you have only one Master and you are all brothers. And do not call anyone on earth “father”, for you have one Father, and he is in heaven. Nor are you to be called teacher, for you have one Teacher, the Christ. The greatest among you will be your servant. For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted. Matthew 23:8-12
I tell you the truth, unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. John 12:24
Blessings,
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anewcreation
5:04 am
This is so true! I have been blessed to have an amazing Leader as a boss THANKS for living this out Pete, and teaching me!
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Tina
6:48 am
Oh thank you for this check list… As a Mother I usually make it a point to review how I say what I say and how I do but I have trouble with making work fun, its mostly something to get done so I’d rather get it done, matter of factly.
Mysoul´s last blog ..Running
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Mysoul
1:12 pm
Boss lives you not interested in learning more. Leader propels you to go an extra mile.
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lindiwe makhalima
11:51 pm
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