Criticize By Creating
I was talking with a friend yesterday and was reminded of the quote from Michelangelo that says “criticize by creating”. If you know me at all you know I’m passionate about the church changing the world. At times I’ve been called naive about this matter, but I really do believe it’s possible.
However, I think it’s quite possible the greatest obstacle to the church bringing about change in this world is our constant desire to tear one another down. I received an email yesterday which just reminded me of how petty we can all be. Here’s a snippet of the correspondence that went back and forth between this dude and my assistant Anne.
Anne,
Maybe you can suggest that Pete quit that constant finger snapping while he is talking. It is very irritating and is a distraction. It reminds me of a sign that I read many years ago.
“Your actions speak so loud, that I can’t buy your looks, or hear what you have to say”.
All of that Type A delivery is boring. Reminds me of Robert Tilton and that other skinny kid in Dallas ( Ed Young,jr).
Sincerely,
XXXXXXXX
Hi XXXXXX,
I’m not quite sure what you are referring to – do you have a specific message in mind when you mentioned this? I will pass this along to Pete. Thank you.
Anne
Hi,
Thanks for your response. The message that is currently on your website has at least three instances of him snapping his fingers trying to emphasize a point, however it didn’t and I found it very distracting, and shows arrogance, like he is correcting his viewers, like a parent does to their child when they are trying to get their attention. It really disgusts me when anyone snaps their fingers at me. It really turned me off to Pete and that on top of the disrespect he shows us viewers that we are not worth him putting on a suit and tie like he would if he went to a formal dinner, and it shows that he is not very professional, and therefore I could not get past that to hear what he had to say. This new look amongst pastors is a downer. Even worldly entertainers think we viewers are worth dressing for. It shows that we are not to take him seriously, which I don’t.
Sincerely,
XXXXXX
I must admit I had to laugh at this. At first I actually thought it was a joke but sadly it’s not. I dream of the day that we as Christians stop criticizing one another and work together to change the world.
If we could just focus on Jesus and his call to “love God and love people” we wouldn’t get so jacked up about whether we have a….
choir or worship team
lights or candles
hymnals or powerpoint
robes or golf shirts
guitars or pianos
video or live
big or small
missional or attractional
Listen, I know there are changes that need to be made in the context of our churches and the greater Kingdom of God. I know there are things that drive you crazy. But please, criticize by creating not by standing on the sidelines and firing your arrows.
Jesus Prayed…
John 17: 20“My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: 23I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.
Man, we’ve got a lot of work to do! I think I’ll start by stopping the snapping. 
126 Comments:
You should get an orange tuxedo with tails and, top hat, and a cane to wear to service. White gloves would cause the inadvertent snap to be muffled thereby reducing the chance that you would distract from the point you were trying to make.
Do you suppose that Peter, James, and John all went home and got their ‘best’ fisherman outfit before they preached to the crowds? Maybe at least a new, blue, beauty sash to throw over their shoulders?
I had a similar discussion with a friend once about what should or shouldn’t be worn to church and into the pulpit. He felt that we should dress our best so I asked him a simple question.
Do you spend more time preparing your heart or your body before going to church?
It drove to the point pretty quickly. I am not saying that we shouldn’t be modest… Lord knows that I would be less distracted if some of the ladies would think about how much cleavage, shoulder, back and leg they are showing in their ‘cute’ outfits. (Guys.. while you don’t distract me with your hairy legs showing up to your thigh, you may want to think about whether its a distraction for the ladies).
I guess we get caught up more in ‘form’ than ‘function’. We want things to con’form’ to how we want them instead of seeing the functional aspect of what is being delivered or done.
For example, I could afford a more expensive car that looks nicer… however, that doesn’t mean that it would function any better than the cheaper, more fuel-efficient, vehicle that I drive now. In fact, the cheaper, more fuel-efficient car that I drive is a better stewardship option because it saves me money that can be used for better activities than just the appearance of what I am driving. Form Vs Function. Appearance Vs Intent.
Ok.. maybe I have beat this dead horse more deader now… so I am going to move on.
And Pete, I giggled too when reading the excerpts above. I hope you didn’t let those barbs sting you too deeply.
Tony York’s last blog post..All Sex Public Showers in Columbus, Ohio
[Reply]
Tony York
5:59 am
Looks like I’m gonna have to go watch the latest message again to see what the snapping thing is all about. I didn’t notice.
[Reply]
Tina
6:03 am
I am not sure why it matters if you snapped your fingers or weren’t wearing a tie? Did he/she even listen to what you had to say?
It’s all so silly. If that’s what he’s concentrating on, then I am very sad for him.
I hope that you didn’t let that discourage you!
Rachel’s last blog post..Why I do this – Part 2.
[Reply]
Rachel
6:23 am
This mkes me so sad that someone has the time to nit pick on something so stupid and small. Jesus said “come Just as you are” Honestly I am really glad that I can ware whatever I want to church. (Glad you can too) And the snaps, well I have never noticed. So I guess I pay more attention to what you say then what you do wile saying it. Isnt that what we are suppose to do? Listen?
And why couldnt the e-mail be sent to you? Hmmmmm
I pray these things dont bring you down! You Rock and so does CP
Jessica Esch’s last blog post..Stretching Myself
[Reply]
Jessica Esch
6:25 am
Oh, whatever! People like that just drive me NUTS! Plank! Plank! Snarky emailer, just shut the hell up, will ya? Thank you.
But Pete, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about your incessant gum chewing…
katdish’s last blog post..These Small Hours
[Reply]
katdish
6:37 am
I think I get where you’re coming from here.
I was serving in a small, rural church in Alabama as youth pastor, and it bothered people that I wore jeans and occasionally a tshirt to church on Sunday mornings.
The pastor, for Christmas, even bought me a John 3:16 tie, which I suppose was a subtle hint that I should alter my wardrobe.
I do find it sad that churches, especially the more traditional ones, equate suits and ties with authority.
And that personal nuances of the speaker overrides the message entirely.
Our authority as ministers, which isn’t even OUR authority, doesn’t come from our dress or mannerisms, but from the Holy Spirit, right?
But for what its worth, Pete, I’d take a pastor wearing blue jeans that has a passion for the Kingdom over one wearing a suit that settles for status quo anytime!
Much love and many prayers.
[Reply]
Kyle Gilbert
6:37 am
Love the creativity quote. Reminds me of something I read in Culture Making: Christian response has usually been critique, consume, condemn or copy (I think those are the 4 he uses) and he says the two postures that have been missing are create (make new things) and cultivate (nourish the beauty of what already exists).
kc’s last blog post..Recent Reads
[Reply]
kc
6:40 am
Wow. I’m always blown away…although I shouldn’t be…when people take the time to write and complain about completely useless things.
I guess I must be pretty amazing to be able to focus on the sermons that I watch online even though you don’t wear a tie and you snap your fingers.
By the way, I’ll be sure to wear a dress next time I watch your sermons online.
STUPID.
Bonky’s Mama’s last blog post..Adventures in Potty-training: Part 294
[Reply]
Bonky's Mama
6:46 am
Dang. now I’m gonna be distracted by your finger snapping or lack or finger snapping. I never noticed it before. ha!
I’d love to read of book filled with nothing but wacky emails to churches.
[Reply]
britt
6:48 am
Pete, I’m Catholic, so I rather like the whole Church Vestment look….Do you think you could…
I’m kidding. Not about being Catholic, but about suggesting you wear vestments. I like that you appear casual in the way you dress, and the finger snapping, and other things. I get that some people are more open to a formal approach, and that is fine. There are formal preachers out there with good messages that people can find. You are meant to reach people who are open to less formal approaches.
1 Corinthians 12:4
Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit.
Keep up the good work!
God bless you.
Helen’s last blog post..Please, Mr. Government Official, Permit Me to Pray With My Friends in My Own Home…
[Reply]
Helen
6:54 am
I always thought Robert Tilton and Ed Young were not even in the same sport if we are comparing preaching styles…
Maybe that’s me.
Hey – capitalize on the finger snapping! We can do West Side Story. Jets vs. Sharks Sunday morning. It will be awesome!
Jonnelle’s last blog post..Meet Prachi
[Reply]
Jonnelle
6:56 am
First,
*high five* to Tony York for this:
“Do you spend more time preparing your heart or your body before going to church?”
Amen to that.
Second…..I am pretty sure that God isn’t keeping a log of His Top 100 Best Dressed Servants. (for what it’s worth….I think dressing casual keeps you most relatable, is that a word? not sure, but you know what I mean)
What I am sure is that He *is* keeping a log of is His Disciples preaching His Good News and reaching out to the lost, hopeless and hungry…..and you are def. keeping up in those ranks!
Third and fourth….this person should concentrate on doing his own work for The Kingdom instead of nit-picking others. And remember Matthew 10:14, Pete!
Peace~
*~Michelle~*
*~Michelle~*’s last blog post..Three Four Things This Thursday (Fisher Cat Slayer, Fort Knox, Shred update and more)
[Reply]
*~Michelle~*
7:03 am
I listened to your podcasts long before I knew what you looked like and what you wore, so when I saw one of your videos I thought “Oh look, Dana Carvey!” Your message speaks much louder than your finger-snapping or your shirt. And I was probably in my jammies, so shame on me.
This guy is showing up at church, and if he wasn’t, he wouldn’t have a thing to criticize. He’s probably someone who could never snap their fingers but he’s coming to hear you teach God’s word. Keep on keeping on, and if you decide to do the “church lady” impression, I want to be there!
Candy’s last blog post..Buddy the Dog or "What’s for Lunch?"
[Reply]
Candy
7:06 am
Finger snapping vs. eye squinting. Hmmm not in the same annoying ballpark. I agree with the one above who would rather listen to one in jeans with a passion for the kingdom than one dressed to the “nines” with nothing to say. You handled this much better than I would have Pete. I would have point blank asked the person, “And what are you doing to make a difference in the Kingdom? Nothing? Then shut up!” Or a more nicer comment: “Keep your criticism to yourself.” I see no difference in finger snapping (if used for emphasis) and saying, “listen. Now listen to me!” As for the dress: the person needs to get a life. Keep the passion Pete.
bill (cycleguy)’s last blog post..Plateaus in Cycling (and life)
[Reply]
bill (cycleguy)
7:07 am
BTW: this is a great study in “how to miss the point because you have your own agenda.”
bill (cycleguy)’s last blog post..Plateaus in Cycling (and life)
[Reply]
bill (cycleguy)
7:09 am
I pray for that dude and lately my general prayer has been that nothing we (believers) do or say would keep people from knowing Jesus more –
Dude – It’s all about Jesus, don’t let anyone or anything(finger snapping or wardrobe) get in your way of knowing HIM more today ~ Please!
[Reply]
Emily
7:23 am
I don’t know how I have missed the snapping. I guess I am usually intently listening to what you have to say. I’d say…don’t stop snapping on his account.
Keep doing what you are doing. You are doing good work.
Lindsey Nobles’s last blog post..San Francisco Bound
[Reply]
Lindsey Nobles
7:24 am
i’m sorry someone was so critical. i go to your typical small town southern baptist “first baptist” church and we’ve actually had people tell the pastors they shouldn’t be on the stage in anything but black dress shoes (the pastor was wearing brown dress shoes). it’s ridiculous at times what people focus on to criticize instead of becoming involved and doing something.
[Reply]
Amy N
7:27 am
Gosh Pete,
Our pastor, Ray Bentley, at Maranatha Christian Fellowship will wear a button up shirt and tie, but for the most part, he and the rest of the men on church staff can be seen wearing Hawaiian shirts. But the way he dresses or the fact that he tells the occasional silly joke never gets in the way of the message of Christ.
I don’t care what you look like, friend, or what your mannerisms are, I’m hearing your heart and what Christ is say to me through your words–because I’m listening.
Thanks for all you do. Loving that Christ speaks to my heart through you. One of the best parts of my day.
Tina Dee’s last blog post..Linore Rose Burkard – Regency Period Author
[Reply]
Tina Dee
7:36 am
Let me cultivate a little:
Not sure I would add missional/attractional to the list. Yes…there are many people drawing lines in the sand on this one but I really believe Attractional churches can be and should be Missional. You guys are demonstrating that pretty well at CP.
kc’s last blog post..Question(s) of the Day
[Reply]
kc
7:40 am
I am a preachers daughter. I know where you are coming from. Wow! I saw it in so many church’s my dad being cut down on stupid things. I have learned through all of this growing up that I want to just show these people the love of Jesus even more. It has been hard over the years! Yes! I will tell you this to hear the mean things said to and about my dad and us girls. He is my dad and still my preacher. We do need to stand up and love like Jesus as a church. Praying for you! You inspire me so many times. I talk about the change you have created in my life to be a better christian to many people. Thank you for taking up the cross and preaching His Word!!!
May God bless you!! May God show this XXXX person the love of Jesus even more!!!
Rachel
Rachel Way’s last blog post..Leaning on HIM!!!!!!!
[Reply]
Rachel Way
7:45 am
Did anyone try to reach out to the guy? I’m not saying his email was OK by any stretch of the imagination (you are who you are and you are doing fabulous things for the kingdom through CP so keep that up and never look back) but sometimes people who criticize others are really just looking for love and attention that they aren’t getting through their own lives/relationships. Maybe he is crying out for help. I don’t know, everyone is bashing the guy through the comments and there has to be some deeper reason why he would just lash out at you over something as silly as finger snapping….
Megan’s last blog post..Yancey en Panama
[Reply]
Megan
7:48 am
Send him your blog link and tell him to read that rather than watch your sermons online. You’ve got a shirt and tie on in the profile pic here… :p
x
Beautiful Intellectual’s last blog post..Possession is 9/10 of the law…
[Reply]
Beautiful Intellectual
7:53 am
But I definitely love your point about criticizing by creating. MANY times those who critique are simply watching from the sidelines and we should all be doing what we can to improve/protect/further His kingdom. Thanks for that reminder Pete!
Megan’s last blog post..Yancey en Panama
[Reply]
Megan
7:54 am
Oh my word! Two things : (1) This guy has WAY too much time on his hands! Tell him if he needs something real to worry about, give me a call, I can give him a few of my worries. (2) Maybe if he prepared his heart for worship before getting to church, petty things wouldn’t distract him from the One he supposedly came to spend time with.
[Reply]
Kelly
7:58 am
that is so aggravating. my husband is the assistant pastor at our church and when the senior pastor was out of town last week, bobby filled the pulpit. he spent all week praying and preparing the service, put a lot of time, effort, and thought into all aspects of it.
then sunday morning, he woke up with a sore & scratchy throat. he had water up there with him, but no throat lozenges, so I gave him a piece of gum to lubricate his throat.
needless to say, he did not stand up there chomping or cracking his gum, just had it in his mouth, and he did spit it out before the sermon.
but wouldn’t you know, someone put an “I wish…” card in the offering plate that said, “I wish…that Bobby would not chew gum.”
Come on!
Is that all they noticed during the entire service? I am very observant and not even I could tell that he was chewing gum, so it really should not have been a distraction.
Why do we do this to each other?
[Reply]
Jennifer
7:59 am
Wow. Really? Sadly, I used to be that emailer(in a volunteer staff position even). I thought I was working on quality control and how we could not be distracting. I was focused on the wrong thing and then quality control became the distraction. Glad God got my head straight. Maybe they need to go to another church where he/she approves of the dress code and gestures. Maybe he/she could use some therapy to see why those things feel so important. Yeah, me again. Man, that just turns my stomach remembering back. Maybe they need prayer to keep the devil out of their head and be able to focus. Don’t we all?
And, next time you serve steak and lobster at your services on fine china with stewards, make sure you wear your suit and tie.
[Reply]
Joni
8:02 am
The part I noticed were the two references to viewers and the implication that the pastor is an entertainer. Thanks for not being an entertainer, Pete, but someone who is passionate about seeing the church change the world. And if you’re naive about that passionate ideal, then count me naive too!
Joel Mayward’s last blog post..Thursday Randomness
[Reply]
Joel Mayward
8:05 am
This reminds me of one of my favorite song lyrics. “Heard of church but ain’t got a suit that’s three piece. So he think that it just ain’t for him”. Would you wearing a suit mean you should be taken seriously or just create one more barrier between you and the people you are trying to reach. I’m all for showing respect but not at the cost of intimidating those who want to find Christ. I like that by wearing whats comforatble the differences between the haves and havenots are diminished.
Chris Sullivan’s last blog post..Round Peg, Round Hole and Me
[Reply]
Chris Sullivan
8:23 am
Buddy, I am glad you have thick skin, I guess it comes to the territory.
I had someone recently comment to me about my pastor in a negative way. He told me that he should not wear sandals when he speaks on Sunday morning. It said he didn’t wear sandals to his own wedding so why should he wear them when he preaches. The guy just laughed and laughed and said you don’t have a come back for that one do you. (Which means he had planned for this encounter for some time)
Normally I would have, a very borderline un-Christ-like comeback I am afraid. Instead, I just told him no, there is nothing I would like to say.
While all this was going on, as with this email exchange, children are dying of starvation and malaria all over the world and people are looking for Christ and instead seeing us instead.
I am naive too. THE CHURCH HAS THE POWER TO CHANGE THE WORLD!
Harold’s last blog post..A Couple Making The Difference
[Reply]
Harold
8:24 am
We did engage with him a little bit – he emailed more than one person on our staff. I agree that hurt people say hurtful things. Other items in his email (not duplicated on Pete’s post) honestly made me very sad. His expectations for churches and pastors Jesus himself couldn’t qualify for – seriously.
He doesn’t live in TN, so, wherever he is, I pray someone will be a big example of grace in his life, and hopefully he will integrate it into his own.
There are so many scriptures I want to quote right now, but I have to get back to work.
Boss’ blog and all…
Anne Jackson’s last blog post..The Drawbridge
[Reply]
Anne Jackson
8:34 am
the way I understand it …you must be doing something right? I love your attitude and pray we all adopt it.
becky’s last blog post..Proverbs 7 – 9; Romans 9
[Reply]
becky
8:38 am
But Pete… Don’t you know what you’re only anointed if you’re wearing a tie?
[Reply]
Angel Castaneda
8:49 am
@Megan, I totally agree. Hurt people tend to hurt people. In this particular case my understanding is the gentleman was not really open to “love”. As you can see above Anne’s correspondence with him was very kind and we chose not to really “attack” back.
@KC, I’m with you bro. I was talking more about the obsession we have with trying to classify churches. I often see “attractional” churches that are very missional and “missional” churches that are anything but on mission.
I’m trying to get beyond what title we put on a particular movement and get to the heart of what they’re living out.
[Reply]
Pete Wilson
8:53 am
Pete – I hope you know that for every person you offend with your wardrobe, you draw 20 more in. I once belonged to a “three piece suit” sort of church and I still have the scars to prove it. So many have been turned off by the traditional pharisee filled churches. Praise God all of those people now have a lot of options as far as where else to go to meet Jesus.
I say – you go with your jean wearing finger snapping self. But that’s just me…
Rachel’s last blog post..I hurt myself with the macaroni salad…
[Reply]
Rachel
8:53 am
This person obviously has a lot of issues and they are taking it out on you.
And also I find it odd this person is accusing you of showing arrogance…really? Did they not read their own email?
If Jesus were here today, I don’t think he would be preaching in an Armani suit. Probably some khakis and sandals. ;]
[Reply]
Andy
9:02 am
Wow someone had too much time on his hands to be able to nit-pick about that! I find it funny because I study autism so I’m usually in tune with those little things and I have never noticed it and I usually sit within the first few rows! We all have our things that we do. At least you don’t pace back and forth across the whole stage and wear the camera people out! You do a fine job and I have never had a problem paying attention due to your actions. And I totally disagree with the outfit comment. I take people more seriously when they are looking like me and not trying to be pretentious or holier-than-thou. That doesn’t meant to come in a bathing suit or pjs, but you get my point!
[Reply]
Jessica
9:09 am
Wow!!!! Thanks for the good laugh this morning! People never cease to amaze me. Keep up the good work, Pete. Oh, BTW if you need some snapping lessons, I know a good teacher. Maybe next week you can add a little whistling to freshen things up. LOL
[Reply]
Ian Black
9:10 am
Don’t change a thing! Love they way you are totally you!
April
Keep up the AWESOME work Love IT!
APRIL’s last blog post..
[Reply]
APRIL
9:13 am
For the record (and this totally not the point) I’ve not been able to find an instance of my snapping my fingers.
If you guys find it on our video podcast please let me know.
[Reply]
Pete Wilson
9:18 am
Hey, is there a possibility he caught a week when Blake was preaching?
Is he a finger snapping kind of dude? Pastor Tom doesn’t seem like a finger snapper culprit.
[Reply]
britt
9:27 am
unbelievable.
but i know why you snap. its to let people know to stop looking up, “hey, im down here people.”
wait. was that a criticism?
dang.
tam’s last blog post..thursday swap – “broken things”
[Reply]
tam
9:45 am
anne told me about this yesterday. it made me laugh because i KNOW i cracked my knuckles during my message in Portland on Sunday. i remember doing it and i can hear it in the beginning of the recording. nervous tick, i suppose.
Crystal Renaud’s last blog post..Beautifully Unconventional
[Reply]
Crystal Renaud
9:49 am
Keep doing what you do, in the way God’s called you to do it!
[Reply]
Ron Swanson
9:54 am
Pete, I enjoy your sermons and listen to you every week! So many of your messages have convicted me. Your preaching and attitude about the church are amazing. Keep doing what you are called to do. Jesus will let you know if you need to change anything
And, I really don’t care if you snap your fingers at me as long as we are changing the world. Let’s do it!
[Reply]
Ms. Shawn Wood
9:54 am
Okay, fine, Pete’s a snapper.
But in his defense, he only snaps his fingers in a series of three while swinging his hand in a “Z” formation and saying something cutesy like, “Oh, no you di-int.”
Gosh, people, Pete can’t be perfect at everything.
Besides, what’s the big deal? Pentecostals have been doing that for years.
mpt’s last blog post..how i overcome writer’s block
[Reply]
mpt
9:59 am
I recently went out to lunch with a pastor friend. His church is currently being remodeled. He says he wishes he could get his members to care about people as much as they care about the color of the carpet.
Michael Patterson’s last blog post..My Youngest Daughter
[Reply]
Michael Patterson
10:06 am
Anti-Snapper Demands Pastor Dress Snappy!
That’s the tabloid version of this post. In the future you should include a quote from the Citizens for a Snap-Free World. you know, to be balanced.
Hysterical.
I prayed for the snarky emailer. Me thinks his Pavlovian response to snapping is quite telling.
Ric Booth’s last blog post..sticks and stones
[Reply]
Ric Booth
10:07 am
Please don’t change a thing.
[Reply]
Heather
10:10 am
@Michael, I’m very blessed to be part of a church that get’s it. They truly prioritize people over buildings and the other things that fill our buildings.
I think your comment must be every pastor’s worst nightmare.
[Reply]
Pete Wilson
10:14 am
Tam might be going to someplace that includes two hockey sticks if she’s not careful… I hear pastors have pull with the Big Guy…
i think some people honestly don’t know how to be if they’re not angry or critical and choose that over joy because it’s comfortable. And if we judge others, we don’t have to look at your own heart. the commenter makes me more sad than anything because I have people in my life who are so quick to judge, but are ignoring their own households. Makes my heart hurt.
From an “outsider’s” point of view, you can express yourself however you feel led.
I come from a liturgical background being Catholic, and I find comfort in the traditions and feel close to Him in the quieter services. But since being online I’m finding a whole new way to worship that fills a different part of me that needed it, too. I once had a priest tell me that I should go wherever I’m nourished… it doesn’t matter what building that is. I’m grateful to be nourished here as well. Thanks.
gitz’s last blog post..Hours of Entertainment…
[Reply]
gitz
10:24 am
Pete – The bottom line is that NO MATTER WHAT you change or do, people with a critical spirit will continue to TRY to tear down Godly leaders. Continue to be true to the Holy Spirit in you and “all things will work for good”. BTW, since I help run sound, I’m usually pretty attentive to the videos to prevent any tech problems, and I don’t ever remember your snapping being a problem or “distracting”. I will pray that this guy be blessed with wisdom and discernment, so that he can escape the harsh judgement in the future that he has put on others because there is truth in the old saying – that you get back whatever you dish out. I think most people that you are “a man after God’s own heart”!!!
[Reply]
Tricia
10:28 am
WOW…hard to believe he was serious. I’m still laughing a little thinking about.
Be encouraged bro. Thanks for sharing this. This is a great message and your words are being heard and received by tons of people…
[Reply]
Brandon Porter
10:36 am
I guess my Pastor and a lot of the Pastors in HI aren’t professional. Not too many of them wear a suit & a tie. Sometime they wear shorts and god forbid slippahs!!!! We even meet under a big white tent.
Pokinatcha’s last blog post..A Day at the beach
[Reply]
Pokinatcha
10:38 am
Oh snap! Its sad that some of these criticizers couldn’t live in the days of the fiery prophets in the Old Testament. Talk about correcting viewers!
I agree 100% on this.
I’ve been blogging about New Passion’s “Foundations” and hit on this today. What makes New Passion Unique? We are simply a piece of God’s ultimate picture. Traditional Churches, Contemporary Churches, Other Denominations, Churches with pastors who snap @ their “viewers” (just kidding with this one I had not read your post yet
) We are all the body & need to come together focused on one goal, like you said…”loving God and loving people.”
P.S. I don’t believe you are naive. I think its possible the church can change the world too! Let’s do it
Nick’s last blog post..New Passion Church: Foundations Part 2
[Reply]
Nick
10:47 am
“Do you spend more time preparing your heart or your body before going to church?” Tony York
“Our authority as ministers, which isn’t even OUR authority, doesn’t come from our dress or mannerisms, but from the Holy Spirit, right?
But for what its worth, Pete, I’d take a pastor wearing blue jeans that has a passion for the Kingdom over one wearing a suit that settles for status quo anytime!” Kyle
I needed those reminders!!! I deal with a legalistic Dad who still complains about a church close to them, a large church with a college, that the pastors now wear polo shirts and leather jackets and they no longer make the boys dress up for classes!
His take obviously leans toward the founding pastor, who passed away a few years ago. My Dad uses the ‘to be set apart, seperate from the world’ argument to say we should all dress uber nice so people will know we are different! Um, Dad, is Donald Trump a Christian???
bluegoose’s last blog post..What a Whirlwind!
[Reply]
bluegoose
10:57 am
Unfortunately this kind of thing happens a lot! My husband has had a few people who said they felt “led” to correct him and ended up bashing him. It hurts but praise Jesus he has thick skin. If I had been there that guy would have gotten throat punch….which is why I am not in front speaking heeeeee! Keep up the good work Pete.
Tiffany’s last blog post..Jon & Kate
[Reply]
Tiffany
11:00 am
“I think it’s quite possible the greatest obstacle to the church bringing about change in this world is our constant desire to tear one another down.”
I agree!
Sarah’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen
[Reply]
Sarah
11:02 am
I have no words right now. I am going to need to take up pottery or knitting or something in order to keep from criticizing those emails.
Melissa Fitzpatrick’s last blog post..The Sad Story of One Backslidden Cook
[Reply]
Melissa Fitzpatrick
11:21 am
You start wearing a suit and I stop listening.
[Reply]
Mike M
11:26 am
well, I keep talking with my friend about you and your church and your family and how many amazing things you do. we are impressed, are we are not even from USA. we even like the casual clothes:D makes you seem closer to people, and I didn’t mean just “makes you look or seem”, but it shouws you are close to them, are want to be part of their lives and get to know them, not just do your thing on Sundays. as far as I am concerned, I think many people have the impression that pastors are a bit … how do I put this… detached from the people, and only get to them when the church members are in some kind of difficulty or sick, and this happens even more often in big churches, as the one I attend. I am not trying to criticize anyone, just saying other things are more important that looks, the way to dress, the way to talk. When I came across your wife’s blog and then yours and found a bit more about CP, I was soooo impressed, and I wished we could do such amazing things here too. But for now, I’ll get inspiration from your videos, and podcasts:)
sorry it’s so long and I hope it’s coherent what I said.
[Reply]
i.i.
11:40 am
Well, Pete, I go to “that skinny boy’s church down in Dallas” and he’s right, Ed does snap his fingers quite often. Hmmm.
Oh, and that same church baptized over 600 new believers over the last 5 weeks.
Maybe there’s more to this snapping thing…
Dude, kick this guy’s dust off your sandals and keep taking hills for the Kingdom. I love what you and CP are doing.
[Reply]
woody
11:59 am
I think your next sermon should include excerpts from his emails (omitting his name of course, as that would just be in bad taste!) along with 42 Bible verses explaining how this kind of behavior is neither Christlike nor God-honoring. Be sure to wear jeans and flip flops! And snap your fingers 462 times.
Then prepare for his emails on Monday morning, and don’t bother answering even one of them unless he sees the error of his ways.
What can I say? Mercy isn’t my spiritual gift.
Jowanna’s last blog post..Memorial Day Weekend
[Reply]
Jowanna
12:05 pm
The critic opens the door to the question: “Who are you getting dressed for? For whose purpose? For who are we trying to impress?” (who / whom.. ???)
I’m hopeful that not everyone missed the point of the quote he quoted (as possibly he did). I believe it’s original intent was pointing to the fact that actions speak louder than words or appearance.
Shannon’s last blog post..May
[Reply]
Shannon
12:23 pm
Oh yeah. I was thinking more about this…
I wonder what closet Jesus kept his suits and ties in since he said…and I quote “the son of man has no place to lay his head”?
I bet Mr. XXXXX hated this show…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xL_9zdu4iVw
[Reply]
Nick
12:51 pm
“Man look at the outside, but God looks at the heart!” Your goal is to please God and try to lead man according to God’s call. I’m glad you are not trying to please people like this gentleman who is obviously a very unhappy person. Here is the truth: IF Jesus were to come walking in many churches today, HE would be rejected, laughed at, made fun of, asked to leave, etc. I don’t think suits were around during his days on earth; I most imagine there were many days He was dirty, barefoot, or sandaled feet, through dusty towns and cities…HE was about HIS FATHER’S business ~! it was not a beauty pageant, a contest, a competition. I hope this person finds the Lord for Himself, and has his heart changed BEFORE Jesus returns!
[Reply]
Lisa
1:26 pm
Nick….Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha You are going to get me fired over here at work! It is getting wild up in here!
Tiffany’s last blog post..Jon & Kate
[Reply]
Tiffany
1:40 pm
Snap away, Pete.
Snap away.
[Reply]
Cheryl Bak
1:41 pm
BTW, I can’t get over the fact some people are so closed-minded that they can’t realize different things mean something different to different people.
Too many assumptions and presumptions in the world, if ya ask me.
I like snapping…reminds me of music
~ @FruitySpirit9
[Reply]
Cheryl Bak
1:44 pm
sad
Melissa Irwin’s last blog post..Processing
[Reply]
Melissa Irwin
1:45 pm
This fall our church decided to gather feedback from the parishioners to help with the parish council’s planning for the future. They decided to conduct one-to-one interviews with any parishioner who wanted to participate, and they used volunteers from the parish as the interviewers.
The consultant they brought in to help with the interview process explained to us that the questions we were going to ask would focus on the positive. What are we doing right? What programs have the parishioners participated in that enhanced their worship experience? What makes them feel welcome at our church? Etc.
Our job was to keep bringing it back around to the positive so that our pastor would know what he is doing right. Interviewees were given a chance to let us know about things that were concerning them (negative comments), but overall it was about building up and not tearing down.
This was a great process. At first I was thinking, “no way will this work; don’t we need to focus on the problems?” But I was really wrong! It was great to concentrate on the positive. Without tearing down, we still managed to collect plenty of information about problem areas, but at the same time, people concentrated on praising people and processes that are on target. This really taught me a great lesson. It’s that maybe that old proverb is true: you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.
Jan C.’s last blog post..Half-Assed
[Reply]
Jan C.
1:49 pm
As the one in our little church that deals with some of these, I applaud those who ran interference for Pete and answered this man. You guys rock. Sometimes it’s not easy to answer in a Christlike way.
I feel sad for this man and the tons of people out there like him who criticize — not so much because their lives are miserable now, but because one day, if they know Jesus, they will have to explain to Him every word critical and motive.
As others have said, Pete, be encouraged. People criticized Jesus and the disciples, too. You’re in good company. And I’m on the naive team. Let’s just keep doin’ what we’re called to!
Faye’s last blog post..leading isn’t easy – Part 3
[Reply]
Faye
1:50 pm
WOW! If this is what the body of Christ has to think about – it is time to really remodel the buildings inside out starting with us the BODY! Come one people – I want my Pastor to be leading me to Jesus. Whether he snaps, crackles or pops! I want JESUS! Nothing but Jesus. I don’t care about fluff and stuff. I don’t care about parades and dancing queens. I want nothing but Jesus and if he shows up in jeans and a t-shirt every Sunday with a cool hair doo telling me all about His truths – I’m all for it! Jesus came and said love one another so that they will know you are Mine. He never said pick each other apart and care about worldly things. He said those who love the world don’t love know or love Me! OUCH! Praying for all the MR. and MRS. XXXXX’s out there to get real with GOD!
Love and blessings Pete!
Jill
Jill’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday – Excitment
[Reply]
Jill
1:51 pm
Oh Snap! I’m new to this blog of yours, and it’s getting snappy around here!
Pete, I can’t figure out whether to laugh or cry. Maybe I should do both, cause I think that both are merited. Personally, I’m just thankful that we have a website, so that could go to church when I’m out on the road, provided that I have an internet connection. But that’s what the church can do for me. What can I do for the church? That should be my real question.
I think that as human beings we are all children of God, and I mean that in every sense of the word. We have the potential to be such great contributors to the world, if we could ever grow up. But, instead, we are a bunch of two year olds running around, staking claim to what is ours, even though it isn’t really ours. We expect God and the world to work for us instead of the other way around. You know, we humans are in our “terrible two thousands” if we consider ourselves “born” to knowing Jesus. And, I would like to say I’m an exception, but I’m not. But, I’m really gonna try to be. Hopefully we can all be more child-like and less childish. I often feel that we as Americans are the luckiest brats of the bunch. I feel a grounding coming on!
Frankly, I think that this person’s email says much more about him than it does you. Ultimately, we are all responsible for our choices and our feelings. When I read this….
“like he is correcting his viewers, like a parent does to their child when they are trying to get their attention. It really disgusts me when anyone snaps their fingers at me.”
There are some issues there. Dude X needs our attention much more than we need his, I would think. Like how a hurt two year old needs a parent.
That’s just my take on it…..Mine, Mine, MINE!!!
Growing pains…..
[Reply]
Wes Little
2:22 pm
Good thing you aren’t a sandal-wearing kind of a guy like those folks over at Christ Community in Franklin!
Don’t know how they managed to get anything done with their dress code…(*end sarcasm*)
I’ve been in the Church my whole life; my dad is a retired pastor & I’ve heard it all. People will always find something to complain about. We are, after all, fallen. I could rant, but I won’t. My take? Focus on what is important: God’s Word. All the rest falls in line.
ginger’s last blog post..What to do?
[Reply]
ginger
2:23 pm
When I first read this I was really mad, then I was extremely sad for this person. Now I’m wondering how do you help someone “get IT”? Guess I’ll just have to pray that they get a clue from the Holy Spirit. These jokers are everywhere…
[Reply]
Cindy Graves
2:41 pm
I remember hearing Ergun Caner tell a group of youth pastors, and I imagine it probably applies here just as well, that “if you aren’t being criticized, you’re not doing your job.”
[Reply]
Kyle Gilbert
2:51 pm
Gitz- LOL at the Tam comment!
Pete- Very irritating. I truly hope you can blow this kind of stuff off and continue to being the man and pastor that lives his life to please God since you can’t please all people. I know you know that but just wanted to encourage you.
Brenda’s last blog post..The Rescue
[Reply]
Brenda
3:09 pm
Amen to that brother!! Ugh, sorry that you have to put up with e-mails like that.
Brunettekoala’s last blog post..My Sister’s Keeper
[Reply]
Brunettekoala
3:22 pm
Oh my word, well speechless sums it up! Don’t change you Pete, love you and you constantly humble me.
[Reply]
Emily Rowe
3:27 pm
Psalm 144:1 [ Of David. ] Praise be to the LORD my Rock, who trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle.
I’ve never noticed that you snap your fingers. Snap away…you’re in training!!
[Reply]
Janie
3:45 pm
Personally,I love the flip flops and cowboy shirts….never noticed snapping,though. I just see your heart for CP…….
[Reply]
Leann
5:25 pm
This breaks my heart. I am having trouble finding any other words to express my thoughts. That this person cannot see or hear a message beyond his/her own arrogance or presumption is not surprising but it is sad.
While in leadership, some of my most painful moments came from the wounds of “church people”. When will we learn to love as Christ loves us?!
Denise’s last blog post..Rerun – Captivity of Grace
[Reply]
Denise
5:34 pm
Pete, I’m glad XXXXX isn’t on your board of personal advisers.
Maybe he hasn’t really caught the whole Kingdom vision-thing – you know, reaching people where they’re at and all – and like, where the CROSS is the POINT.
God bless him with growth Lord!
[Reply]
Mike in Milwaukee
5:52 pm
Not having seen Pete’s preaching, I don’t know the whole story, but the original comments do seem a little silly. But then so do a lot of the follow-up comments.
While the author of the emails that prompted this blog entry do seem a little petty in that Pete’s snapping distracted him hearing the message and his casual attire made it less easy to take him seriously, so do most of the annoyed following comments.
If all in the church feel the freedom to dress as they are comfortable, and that comfort means casual for a big majority, then ‘Annoyed Man’ needs to consider things within himself. Me: I like to dress a little nicer on Sunday just because it helps me feel better about myself and I’m comfortable that way. (Also I don’t have the legs for shorts.)
However, if we can, for the moment, equate the amazing saving grace of Christ as the best meal/buffet in the grandest restaurant, would we be okay if that mych anticipated glorious meal was served on dirty, chipped plates, bent silverware, and glasses with lipstick stains on them? The dress of people involved with leading the communal worship times is important and something those people need to take into consideration. Those in that role for each service are not there for themselves, they are there to lead others into worship, be it with music, speaking, reading scripture, taking offering, filling the coffee pot etc. These people are not there for the service. The leading of others into worship IS their act of worship at that time.
I’m hoping the author of the email is not reading these, as it couldn’t be very uplifting or overflowing with “Christian Love” from his point of view. Has anything been done to see how this individual is doing or working to resolve things?
Can’t we all just get along?
[Reply]
Anthony Epp
6:49 pm
I have this horrible fear that I’m going to get up there Sunday and have this urge to snap.
It’s going to be hard to control.
[Reply]
Pete Wilson
7:10 pm
That is funny. You should stop forcing that person to watch your sermons online… oh wait, you don’t.
I’m glad my hand doesn’t complain about my feet. They just work together as individual but whole parts of the body… focusing in one their instructions from the head.
[Reply]
Daniel Decker
7:33 pm
Pete when I first read your blog I was incredulous, but as I read the comments I and thought this through, I was saddened by the insensitive nature of almost every response. Is this what “Christians” do? Thanks Anne Jackson and Anthony for two voices of reason. I would suggest you contact this person Pete and maybe take them to lunch. It sounds like they need some compassion and a pastor rather than becoming the topic of the blogosphere. I’m just sayin!
[Reply]
Jeff
7:54 pm
87 comments, let’s pile on!
[Reply]
Jeff
7:57 pm
Pete: I know this is long…sorry…
Reading “A Tale of Three Kings”: Chapter 7:
“Unlike anyone else in spear-throwing history, David did not know what to do when a spear was thrown at him. He did not throw Saul’s spears back at him.
Nor did he make any spears of his own and throw them.
Something was different about David. All he did was dodge the spears.
What can a man, especially a young man do when when the king decides to use him for target practice? What if the young man decides not to return the compliment?
First of all, he must pretend he cannot see spears. Even when they are coming straight at him. Second, he must learn to duck very quickly. Last, he must pretend nothing happened.
You can easily tell when someone has been hit by a spear. He turns a deep shade of bitter. David never got hit. Gradually, he learned a very well-kept secret. David discovered three things that prevented him from ever being hit by spears:
“One, never learn anything anything about the mastered art of spear throwing. Two, stay out or the company of all spear throwers. And Three, keep your mouth tightly closed.
In this way, spears will never touch you, even when they pierce your heart.”
Keep ducking…
[Reply]
Lorrie Harden
8:00 pm
In ministry….have had emails like this many times…..one word…B.O.N.D.A.G.E!!
These type of things must just grieve the Holy Spirit. If “they” could just taste a little bit of who Jesus is, they would NEVER be phased by a snapping preacher, that isn’t dressed up (ha)…
tracy’s last blog post..How She’s Feels About the Last Week of School
[Reply]
tracy
8:06 pm
@Jeff, You’re right bro. But let’s go back to the post. This isn’t about Mr. xxxxx. The post clearly is written about ALL of us. It’s about our inability to walk with one another without shooting arrows.
I could use hundreds of daily examples. This particular email was just a blatant example of what exist on some level inside of every one of us.
And trust me…this individual sent numerous emails to numerous staff and every CP staff member responded in a loving Christlike way. We do our best not to hurt back the hurt people that hurt people.
[Reply]
Pete Wilson
8:14 pm
Are you KIDDING ME?!?!?!?!
one phrase to that individual…
‘grow up!’
(oh wait, was I being too critical???)
[Reply]
Paula
8:22 pm
Pete,
You and the staff at CP are doing a great job, keep up the good work!
It is truly a shame that people who truly worship the same God but have slightly different “perspectives” have such a hard time seeing that we’re all in this together.
(I better see you in a robe with a hymnal when i check out this upcoming sermon)
Jeremy’s last blog post..You Can’t MVP Life
[Reply]
Jeremy
8:24 pm
Just read your comment after mine…It is sad that in our human(ness) we have the inability to walk with one another without shooting arrows…
Exactly what the book was saying…
I am so glad that I belong to a church where the you and the staff does their best to be like David…
Praying for all of you…
[Reply]
Lorrie Harden
8:30 pm
In my opinion, some people go into church or online to intentionally find something wrong with that particular sermon, blog or pastor. They are not searching for what is right or good, but what is “wrong” or bad. This goes for non-believers as well as some Christians. Have I always agreed with everything that Pete has said, all I have read from John Eldridge or everysingle lyric from a particular song? “NO”(Sorry, Pete). Now do I harp on the couple of “snaps” or the other 95% that I loved and could relate to. Christians have killed over this in the past. Isn’t this why the Pilgrims came to America? I loved when CP used to end services with “if CP wasn’t what you were looking for, we will help you find a church.” BRING IT BACK PETE! It showed an unconditional love and was such a rare, priceless example of humility. Just like letting the offering pass by visitors…
Jody’s last blog post..Generation Xill
[Reply]
Jody
9:21 pm
As has been often mentioned, there is no shortage of churches in the greater Nashville area. I pray that Mr. XXXXX can find a church that has a pastor who can deliver the message in a style that resonates with him….because it is eternally important that he receives the message. There are all different styles of delivery, which resonate with different individuals.
Pete, I personally like your style…but only because it is successful in linking me with Christ. However, some individuals have a different set of “expectations” of their pastors. Some individuals are convinced that a pastor must wear a suit and tie to be credible, which is fine (but I believe incorrect). Conversely, others believe that a pastor should refrain from the suit, and instead wear sandals, “scuzzy clothing” and don a hair-style that mixes male hair product and six hours in a wind-tunnel.
Both sets are equally foolish. They are both willing to swap Christ and his message for a feel-good “social hour” with a pastor who fits their human vision of what a pastor should look like.
These little personal diversions and divisions within a church are beautiful little doses of Satan. He understands that one of the best methods to keep people from Christ and his liberating message is by diverting attention from Christ’s message to his messengers (pastors).
[Reply]
Nate VZ
9:30 pm
Amen! I am constantly praying this for the believer communities in TA too. Being as there are so few, its disheartening that there are sooooo many dissentions. Thanks for posting!
Maureen’s last blog post..חג שבעות- The Feast of Weeks
[Reply]
Maureen
12:27 am
I think it comes between religion and relationship, which one motivates you. In religion you are focused on the snapping of fingers and if they have a tie on but in relationship you are focused on what is being said. You are looking and listening for what can help you know HIM better and help you love each other better.
I live hundreds of miles from CrossPoint but listen to the podcast because I desire relationship. I love what you guys are doing because it is so awesome. You keep on keeping on!
Ginger’s last blog post..love?????
[Reply]
Ginger
4:12 am
Pete,
This reminds me of the content of my post before last entitled “Overrated leadership, inflated egos and church politics – the weapons of mass destruction threatening the church today”. Reading the content of your post is just a confirmation of what is going on in the church today.
Let destructive comments like that person’s email bounce off you, and keep your focus on what you are trying to create. The enemy goes back and forth trying to find whom he can devour. Focus all your energy on where Jesus is taking you and he will eventually flee from you.
ransom33
ransom33’s last blog post..WAKE UP AND SMELL THE ROSES! OLD WINESKINS NO LONGER FIT
[Reply]
ransom33
4:32 am
Thanks Pete for the response. I know you and your staff at Cross Point do a great job of living out the model of walking with one another without “shooting arrows”. I love that you preach inclusion “everyone’s invited, no ones perfect, and anything is possible”, but I can’t help but be concerned when most of the bloggers responses are “shooting arrows” right back at the problem. Comments like “I better see you in a rob and hymnal” “I wonder what closet Jesus keeps his suits and ties in” “Do you suppose that Peter, James, and John all went home and got their ‘best’ fisherman outfit before they preached to the crowds? Maybe at least a new, blue, beauty sash to throw over their shoulders? “you start wearing a suit and I stop listening”.
It seems that we just continue the vicious cycle of “shooting” and not healing. I love you Pete
[Reply]
Jeff
4:41 am
@Jeff, Again, good point. Did you read Nate VZ’s comment. It’s just a couple comments up. I thought he nailed it.
[Reply]
Pete Wilson
4:48 am
You should totally snap your fingers on Sunday! Ha
Mr. X needs to focus on Jesus and not on what the outwardly appearance and such looks like. I’ll be praying for Mr. X and that God will work on his heart and that we can ALL love him unconditionally!
This verse in Corinthians came to mind: So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
[Reply]
Falguni
6:49 am
Reminds me of an old sales saying: SWx3=N Some will, some won’t, so what. NEXT! Everybody is not for everybody. Jesus preached but not everyone listened. Paul preached but not everyone listened.
I hope this lady can find a minister that she can connect with and receive from. The snapping is classic communication tool. i know VERY effective ministers that use a clap instead of snapping to accomplish the same thing you were doing. Because I’m a student of communication I could always time his but I think that speaks more to his rhythm as a speaker than being predictable.
Anywho, keep doing what you are doing and do a snap for me this Sunday. Thanks!
[Reply]
Steve Patton
6:50 am
Wow. That’s amazing. The arrogance in that guy’s email!
Pete, your response reminds me of an article I wrote for the Relevant Mag website a few years ago. http://www.relevantmagazine.com/features-reviews/god/846
Robert’s last blog post..Swinging Like Rory
[Reply]
Robert
7:26 am
Can I just offer a different spin on it? People often become critical when they feel they have no power. They are told they are valued and loved. They are told that they are a very important part of something. But, they knew deep in their souls that are not the ones making any crucial decisions in the “relationship” (whether boyfriend-girlfriend, friend-friend, wife-husband, employee-employer, parent-child, etc.)
Knowing this, they have a few alternatives:
1. They can stuff their feelings and become apathetic about the relationship. They will get excited when things are going their way and ignore it when things are not. In church, we call them pew-warmers.
2. They can walk away from the relationship and find another in which they are listened to more, respected more, and have more say over how things transpire. In church, we call these “leavers” empowered or bitter (depending on whether we are happy with our own relationship/s or not.)
3. They can attempt to stay within the relationship and try to equalize the power. This can be a good thing–when power is able to be shared and concerns are resolved through compromise or sacrifice. But it can be a bad thing, too–if compromise takes too much time, too much effort, and results in an ugly tilt of power to the other side. In churches, we call this progress or a waste of time (depending on our perspectives.)
In this particular case, in my opinion, the guy is a nitpicker. But he is at least attempting to “fix” the relationship before giving up. I am afraid sometimes that “Let’s not tear each other down” is subconcious pastor-code for “We’re too busy working on BIG things for God to hear the “petty” concerns of our family members.” That scares me as much as Christians attacking each other…
[Reply]
ttm
9:45 am
This made me laugh too. Guess no 1 will “fall asleep” in the congregation now..every1 will be looking out for some finger snapping and “the other little things that Pete does”..
- w/c i wouldnt know and wouldnt care about coz i came to listen to the Word. i wud b 2 busy listening and getting it into me 2 focus on the stuff Pete does.
keep on preachin’ and snappin’
[Reply]
Era
9:56 am
Your readers have answered your “friend” beautifully. Good going, all. I’ll just add that he should memorize Philppians 4:8 and recite it aloud about ten times a day – “Fix your thoughts on what is true and good and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely, and dwell on the fine, good things in others.”
Finger snapping? One of my favorite pastors did it all the time. Casual dress? Here in Wyoming I’ve routinely seen preachers preach in blue jeans, doctors (men and women) doctor in blue jeans, and judges judge in blue jeans (no, I did’t get a traffic ticket – wound up on a two-week trial jury).
Prayers and baest wishes.
[Reply]
Pete Ahlstrom
9:57 am
@ttm,
I really appreciate the three points that you have highlighted. I think 3 is a really hard one to get right but has the ability to make a real change.
Tony York’s last blog post..There’s No F In Weigh
[Reply]
Tony York
11:23 am
As pertinent as the point of the original post was, and as sad as the issue itself is, the attitude of many of the people commenting down here (most long-time regulars) is even sadder.
Pot, meet kettle.
[Reply]
The Truth
11:26 am
Thanks, Tony. More and more I think that the church will not have the capacity to change the world until it first stops resisting change in itself. And when I say “church” I am speaking of both the institutional church and “Christ in me.” We are both “a real piece of work,” if you know what I mean!
[Reply]
ttm
11:30 am
@ttm, I can see where you’re coming from. However, in this case I think it’s a bit of a stretch to assume this individual is trying to “fix” something. There’s a big difference between seeking understanding and criticizing someone.
I wish he was really seeking to “fix” the relationship as you mentioned. If that were the case this would be so easy. We could sit down and here one another out. We could sit down and even agree to disagree.
I’ve got tons of friends that I disagree with on theology and methodology. In each case though we’ve made a choice to prioritize the relationship over our individual agendas.
I’m always open to listening to the concerns of church family members. These are the people I’m doing life with and I learn from them on a daily basis. There comments, concerns and crtiques have partially shaped who I am today!
Your comment is great (tons of wisdom there) but it’s working off the assumption that there is an existing relationship which there is not. There is a big difference between church family and a dude that lives a thousand miles a way and listens to one message and fires off a tone of emails to me and the rest of our staff. Big difference.
Not that we shouldln’t respond in love, because we should, but it does make a big difference.
[Reply]
Pete Wilson
12:14 pm
Pete, Thanks for taking time to respond to my comment. I was assuming relationship between you and Mr. EMail, and I do see how his motivation would likely be to attack rather than to fix without that solid relationship.
Your church family is very blessed to have a pastor who has an open door policy and who listens with the intent of understanding and resolving. I was part of a church in which the staff claimed to have/do those things, but in reality was very insulated from the concerns of the family and held themselves in a position above critique. If you were not a “yes-person” willing to make unreasonable sacrifices of time, money, and even convictions for the church, you were not worthy of the inner circle. And even if you were part of that inner circle, it was often shortlived.
It was a very lonely, frustrating, dysfunctional experience for me (and several who made the difficult decision to leave.) Healing from spiritual abuse is difficult; I suspect Mr. EMail may fight some of the same demons I do. I’m thankful that your listening ear and open door and willingness to consider change means that people in your church family won’t have to endure the same abuses. Sincere love makes all the difference.
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ttm
12:51 pm
I don’t think that sort of stuff will ever go away this side of heaven. Unfortunately, people think their version of church and ministry is the right one, and sometimes that is from whatever they grew up with, but usually what they attend now. It’s just a shame when someone tells others how God’s message should be delivered.
But I think he deserves prayer and care, not mockery or scorn. Let’s act like we say we believe.
Philippa’s last blog post..What house are you building?
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Philippa
4:00 pm
Amen, Pete! This is about ALL of us and how we act not only within our own church, but in the world as Christians.
I try to use humor when I can, because I think that it can be good medicine. And, I must admit, this “snapping” thing has really been humorous to me. I would think that this kind of personal attack on you would be hurtful in some way…at least it would hurt me if I were in your shoes. I also think that we as your parishioners, are trying to support you through these kinds of trials, both as friends and as Christians. I wish, too, that we could ALL do it in a creative, loving way, as opposed to whipping out the arrows.
That being said, I have no idea what it’s like to be working in the administrative branch of the church on a daily basis. I would think it would be like leading Israel to the Promised Land. With all the complaining and daily challenges in the church, it has to be rough.
I guess that my Grandmother said it best with the adage of “If you can’t say something nice, then just don’t say anything.”
But, one thing that I find interesting about this whole thing is that somehow, thousands of miles away, that there is a guy that is listening to you. And, he’s screaming out for communication, I’m thinking. Of course, I don’t know the whole story with this person. But just by the repeated verbal arrows says to me that he’s trying to communicate, although it’s really negative communication, and something is (or was) attracting him to your messages and to the site. I firmly believe that God can and will use anything for his purposes to bring us all closer to him. I hope that is what is happening here somehow.
I think that that we are doing awesome things through God at CPC. I think that you are a man on the right path for God, and I’m glad to be a part of it. I hope that we all can gain some wisdom through this and that we can ALL “snap out of it,” too.
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Wes Little
4:13 pm
I think what we have here is a classic case of ‘there is something in your eye.’
Mat 7:3 NIV, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?”
A plank is something which is made by man.
I counseled a lady from my church along the same topic. She was so fixated upon what other people were doing during worship or how she thought she was being looked at, she could not find the real reason she should be there in the first place. This is a CLASSIC mind game Satan plays on us time and again.
Our only concern when we enter God’s house should be doing business with Him.
Cecil Chaney’s last blog post..Fourth Place
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Cecil Chaney
5:47 pm
The Prez at the college I attended 137 years ago always said this in chapel and i still use it today…..
“We will do one of two things in Church, we will worship or criticize those who do”
Thanks Pete, We love ya in Arkansas!!! (GO HOGS!)
Randy Wood’s last blog post..Living Beyond Ourselves
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Randy Wood
6:10 pm
Oh my, that made me laugh. Sadly, it sounds just like the church. We’re so quick to focus on the silly details that make no difference, instead of the *message*. Reminds me of a church I went to back in the day…I was in the worship band and the church spent hundreds and hundreds of dollars on a fancy electronic drum set because they kept getting complaints that “the drums were too loud!” {and they already had a BEAUTIFUL expensive drum set}; this was after completely changing the services so that the early was “traditional” and later was “contemporary” so people didn’t have to be offended by the music.
In the end, the new drums sucked, the church wasted hundreds of dollars it could have better used to serve *people* and those who complained just found something new to whine about – like the size of the pencils in the pews or the font in the bulletins.
Chere’s last blog post..substitution
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Chere
6:12 pm
I just wanted to pop in and say how impressed I am by your response. That email bugged me and it didn’t have the littlest bit to do with me. I don’t even go to your church or live in Nashville!
Thanks for being a leader and not simply a reactor. I’m inspired to be more gracious in the face of criticism.
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The Secret Life of Kat
6:41 pm
I worked in youth leadership for a church in Phoenix for 7 years and one in Atlanta for 5 years before that, during that time I learned that when working in leadership, you often have to endure harsh criticism. A church that I met with here, when I first moved to Nashville, had a really smart way of dealing with criticism. Any time someone came to the leadership with a complaint, the leadership engaged them and asked how they could help the complainer take the steps to “fix” the problem. In this case, it might have been to ask the complainer how the church could support them establishing a ministry to help reform finger-snapping preachers. I know this example is overly-cheeky, but such a method invites them to “complain by creation” and put the solution to the “problem” into the hands of the member. In the Army, there was a saying, “If you see it a problem, you own it.” What I’ve learned over the years is that those who “see problems” the most are often the least likely to do anything to help fix anything, they feel their value is best served on the sidelines offering color commentary. I say this as someone who often finds himself actually being the one who is the big complainy-pants. It may not be the finger-snapping, but I have a list
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PJ
10:00 am
I think it would be easy for me (like so many here) to back you and say “la la la you are so fabulous” because that’s what I think but the other first thing I thought of when I read this was how fixated he or she must have gotten when they viewed your sermon. You know when you (me) are in the middle of something and you are trying your hardest NOT to deal with your own garbage, and you sift and sort and blame and point…all trying not to pay attention to your own crap? Maybe that is what this person was doing. I have no idea because I “feel” like I am projecting, but as soon as I read this (my third first thought) was that “dang, how many times do I nit-pick and tear somebody down, rather then show love?” CRAP! I suck.
kristiapplesauce’s last blog post..Shake it.
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kristiapplesauce
10:45 pm
Quote from Evelyn Christenson book: “Remember, after you do enough dissecting(criticizing-my thought), you no longer have a flower.”
Diane’s last blog post..Stewing My Thoughts
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Diane
2:00 pm
Nate’s comment ROCKS! Keep on snapping Pete! And keep dressing snappy too!
Ladybird’s last blog post..Lovin’ From Aunt Lauren
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Ladybird
6:34 pm
Isn’t it amazing what people will focus on in order to avoid perhaps listening to what God might have to say? Focusing on dress, gender, even mannerisms etc are all- in my opinion – avoidance tactics. Which is sad.
Sometimes it can be very hard to keep moving forward when we’re hit with criticism so I pray that you will be blessed with encouragement today Pete.
jan owen’s last blog post..Worship Confessional – When God Takes Over
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jan owen
5:28 am
Love this, Pete. It’s so much harder to criticize when you’re actually doing something. Sounds like great things are happening at CrossPoint (hear about the new church campus). Congrats.
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Jeff Goins
1:55 pm
thanks for sharing this. i attend a small town southern baptist church that has some awesome things happening, but is so bogged down by people like your emailer that i am at the point of dreading church. i serve on that “awful” praise team that leads in “terrible” music and is going “to cause a church split” (said by a deacon as we walked down the line at a church meal). and it is just “not right” that the choir does not sing EVERY sunday. and can you believe that our drummer actually wore a tie–what was he thinking he never wears a tie he always wears jeans and a tee(said by another deacon). and yet another deacon stopped us in the hall before worship one sunday to tell us that his sunday school class hates “our” music. we nicely said that it wasn’t “our” music. . .
anyway, i am at a point where i am struggling to want to go to church. thankfully, i found your blog and your podcasts (i am a college friend of jenni catron), and i guess it just helps to know that those criticizers are everywhere…
[Reply]
mel
8:27 pm
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