I am with you… I am not doing well in this area. For me it comes down to just plain laziness.

And, I am being completely open and honest… maybe just a pinch of – “will it change anything” syndrome. I don’t doubt God but I get to thinking that He already knows our cares before we ask. So I have to remind myself that prayer is about so much more than just supplication. And then I am back to laziness.

Yeah, I pretty much suck in this area. Thanks for the reminder, Pete

Tony York’s last blog post..Square Dancing on Round Wheels

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Addictive illusion…I really like that description of control.

John’s last blog post..Outsourced Evangelism

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Prayer, more than any other spiritual discipline, reveals what’s really in your heart and how much pride you operate in.

So true.
Praying for me lately has been a lot about realizing that I’m talking to the guy that created me and knows my thoughts (intimidating occaisionally)… I always have to admit how much pride I have because God sees through my problems and knows the root of the issue. Prayer is the only thing that keeps me honest. Absolutely.

Heather’s last blog post..+did you catch the twilight on your way into work?

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I think it’s great that you followed up a post about skunks with a post about prayer.
I stink at praying because I can’t sit still and also because sometimes I’m afraid to hear what God has to say to me. In the end, He loves me and I am His but getting to that point is often scary. Knowing my downfalls is one thing-willfully acknowledging them in front of my God is quite another.

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Absolutely!!! Its something I also struggle with. Its so much easier for me to just ‘talk’ to God while I’m walking here and there, without having to categorizing it as ‘prayer’. For some reason when I tell myself that I need to spend time in prayer, my mind ends up wandering.

I definitely need a stronger prayer life!!!!

Maureen’s last blog post..Ulpan Sader

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I have never prayed out loud in my small group because I am too nervous that I would “do it wrong”. But I don’t think twice about praying out loud to my 3 year old Kidz World class. I am going to pray to be a better pray-er!!

Ladybird’s last blog post..Gene Simmons Wanna-Be

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GREAT message on prayer yesterday, Pete! The concept of “prayer props” was brilliant! What a perfect way to stay in a prayer-mode all day long. I’m working on a book titled “Confessions of a Prayer Slacker” and I’m thinking I should quote you on this. With your permission, of course! AMAZING service yesterday!

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If I’m honest, I don’t really pray at all. I don’t know how to pray anymore. That sounds awful, but it’s true. I mean if I say that I’m going to pray for someone, then I do, but that’s easy. For myself though, I just don’t know what to say to God.

I realized several years ago that when something went wrong in my life or I needed something, I wasn’t really praying… instead I was trying to bargain with God (and by the way, that never really works out the way you think it should), so I stopped doing that.

Maybe I’m scared to hear what He’s going to say back to me, maybe I’m scared He just won’t be listening… I don’t know; I just know that somewhere along the way I stopped and now I don’t know how to start again.

I hadn’t thought about it being pride – I’ll have to give that a little more thought.

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Lately I have been talking to God like an imaginery friend. While some might think I am insane, I believe it is the most sane way for a believer to live. It keeps my conscience (the Holy Spirit) in constant check. It keeps me in the moment.

Jody’s last blog post..God Cruise Control

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I have really really struggled with this.

I think my problem is that I never have prayed out loud, but always in my own head….the thought of me doing it out loud, in front of others freaks me out.
Ironic figuring that I do a ton of public speaking.
I am with some one else above….I really also worry that I will do it wrong.

joseph’s last blog post..my life slump

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I just wanted to add – for men, my favorite prayers are by humble men. Men who just talk to God, who stumble over their words, because they didn’t plan them and they aren’t acting out a message. You hear their sincerity, and vulnerability.

Sometimes it is hard to pray out loud because that is what you are doing: making yourself vulnerable before God; that is difficult to do in front of people, especially if you have trust issues.

Fear of failure is not of God, no one fails in his eyes. But he will often encourage you to “try again.”

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From the comments here, it is apparent that we somehow think there is a “right way” to pray. Isn’t prayer just talking to and listening to God?

I’m with Jody on this one. I talk to God like I talk to an imaginary friend. If my mind wanders during prayer, so be it. In every relationship I have, conversation is sometimes impacted by wandering minds and inattention and one or the other of us not getting the message the other one was trying to send.

I think the reason we feel like we are “failing” at prayer is because we don’t understand the teacher’s grading scale. In fact, I don’t even think the teacher HAS a grading scale in this subject.

I believe the reason God encourages us to pray without ceasing is because he just wants to hang out with us–no matter how eloquently or stupidly we express ourselves. He just wants us in class–He might wake us up with a gentle whack if we fall asleep–but I doubt that He’ll fail us if we continue to show up. Of course, I might have skipped class the day He explained the grading scale. I mean, I’m nowhere near graduating yet, and I still have a lot to learn so don’t depend on my notes. You’d better ask the Professor.

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I know what you mean. I like driving, too. It’s hard to be a passenger when the car feels like it’s going too fast. It’s even worse when it feels like things are moving waaaaaaay too slow. Are you sure we couldn’t get our hands on those cars like they have in Driver’s Ed. where there are pedals on BOTH sides? Maybe we could a deal if we bought in bulk? ;^)

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I am doing okay on private prayer, I think. That’s never been a huge problems for me. What I have trouble with is praying with other people in small groups. I feel self-conscious! I am related to too many people who are convinced that the concept of God isn’t believable or provable, and that only a silly person would be trying to delude themselves that there is someone out there watching over them and loving them. So I tend to be waiting for someone to smirk at me in those more intimate situations of prayer.

And that makes me mad at myself, yet I can’t seem to get over it!

Jan Connair’s last blog post..If You Can’t Say Something Nice . . .

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Fresh Wind Fresh Fire is one of the best books I’ve ever read. LOVE it!

Michelle Pendergrass’s last blog post..New Pet Project–Visual Prayer Sharing

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@Tony York, Sure! It’s a balancing act. I’m going to do a post later this week that talks about they rhythm of prayer I’ve tried to establish in my life.

I call it a “stream of prayers.” I hope this will provide some clarification.

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Tonyyork, those are good (and difficult) questions. Yes, I do think conversation tends to fall into some sort of pattern. I find in my own life that the closer I am to someone, the less patterns permeate our communication.

Sometimes a friend in great need will call and leave a message on the machine like “Oh, my gosh. Call me back. It’s important.” No niceties lead up to the crucial message. I’ve known people in close knit small groups who just get up and leave in the middle of someone else’s sentence–all conversation stops and for a moment or two, there’s no pattern at all. Just really uncomfortable silence.

So, yes, patterns in communication are probably the norm. But I think there are exceptions. And–at least for me–the exceptions come as relationship deepens.

Regarding The Lord’s Prayer, I’ve occasionally wondered if Christ would have even offered a “model” of prayer without being asked for one. I used to teach creative writing to children and spent hours planning lessons which would jumpstart students’ creative thought. Often students stated that they NEEDED TO SEE an actual sample of what I considered acceptable, good, or outstanding.

Whenever I gave an example, I was clear that if they parroted those words back to me, they hadn’t gotten the point. The point was that I wanted THEIR ideas and THEIR patterns and THEIR unique sentences and stories and word combinations. I would give them an example as a starting point to demonstrate techniques or highlight good writing, but I never intended that sample to become their mantra or their endpoint.

In my opinion, Christ was emphasizing more of a pattern of the heart than a pattern of how to put together words or ideas when he prayed the Lord’s Prayer for the benefit of his disciples. If we pray the “heart” of Christ’s prayer we will: remember that we are in relationship with God, remember where He is (and where we are by comparison), remember that He is holy, attempt to align ourselves with His purposes and will, remember that we are dependent upon him for sustenance and forgiveness, remember that we are commanded to forgive those who have hurt us, and remember to ask for his help. How we say that or what order we say that in or the words we use doesn’t really matter. I think that’s where our relationships with God become unique and personal rather than groupthink and stale.

Your thoughts?

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Started to not respond to this.. then prayed about it.

I was ill for many years. It was when I was paralyzed from the neck down that I really came to understand who was in control & when prayer became so much more real to me. Kind of hard to have too much pride when you cannot even take care of your own basic needs.

Prayer has become as breathing to me. While I ended up receiving the miracle of being completely healed physically… may I never forget my need for the One who gave me life & still gives it every single day.

That’s one of the reasons why I have things like “Praying Monday” via facebook and/or twitter. While it may not seem like much to some – it has helped me to have the abundant life He can only give. It causes me to seek, listen, learn, give and etc…

It’s also how I can say.. I’m thankful for having been ill.

Cameyg’s last blog post.."Killing Cockroaches" – One Foot At A Time

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Well, there you go.

And to think, I was pretty proud of myself for not struggling with pride.

Cindy Beall’s last blog post..Brotherly “Love”

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@ Tony York, I enjoyed your questions and insights, too. Thanks for the discussion.

I can’t wait to hear what Pete has to say in his upcoming post on the rhythm of prayer. It’s interesting to hear people talking (well, writing) about a subject that is so often kept close to the vest.

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I was challenged this week on the whole prayer thing. Not on being inconsistent…but on being ritualistic. Dang it. But I do wonder if you are selling yourself short. I mean you do know yourself better then any of us do. But I get the “feeling” that you are a pretty Godly man, Pete. And you don’t really get that way without having communion with the Holy One. I am not trying to butter you up or anything, I just wonder if you are really, really battling prayer…or if you just don’t really recognize all the sweet and tender surrender moments for what they are. My whole day is wrapped in prayer and almost none of it consists with my head bowed or eyes closed. Obviously you know that it doesn’t have to “look like that” but I wonder if you aren’t wrapped more in prayer then what you are giving credit for. I think it is about heart motive, and from this point of view, I am pretty certain you are talking to God and he is talking to and through you. Please forgive me if I am totally off base here. Seriously. I am sorry if I am.

kristiapplesauce’s last blog post..Monday Prayer

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good stuff billy j
which reminds me of a song….”The billy jean is not my lover…she’s just a girl…who says I am the one….”
Now you’re going to have that song stuck in your head for the rest of the day!

kc’s last blog post..The "Church Next" (PT.1)

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Dang it Pete! There you go again asking a question or raising an issue that makes me really look at myself, my behavior, my motivation and not particularly liking what I find. I am right there with you with the control thing. I tend to think I’ve got a handle on stuff and I’m like, “OK God, I’ve got this under control right now, but if you don’t mind, just kinda stick around and be ready if I need You.” Hey, that would make a good topic for a series – you could call it something real catchy like “Backseat Jesus” or something! And I am guilty of convincing myself I don’t have the time to pray, because I have to be here, go there, do this and that. And as I think about it, I wonder if that’s not really a sign of laziness. I’m to lazy to take the time to sit down and really look at me schedule of “stuff” I think I need to do. There’s probably a bunch of junk I could scratch off my “to do” list because it’s stuff God didn’t ask and never intended me to do! It has been said that Martin Luther once stated that he was so busy and had so much to accomplish every day that if he did not read his Bible and pray for three hours a day that he would never be able to get everything done! Wow. One other observation, at least for me, is the fact that I all too often fail to fully realize to Whom I am speaking when I pray. Who among us would not be thrilled and giddy with anticipation at the prospect of meeting and talking, even for five minutes with someone in a position of prominence and/or importance? A major league sports figure, famous actor, Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, president, etc. We would no doubt give careful thought to what we would say, wanting to get the most out of the conversation. How much more should we be eager, thrilled and yes, giddy with anticipation about talking to and hearing from the Creator of the universe? Hmmm – Guilty! So yeah, again – thanks for busting my chops!

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Pete, I pray all day, I have found it is better to do that, I have my formal times and I’m still not as good as I’d like to be but ceaselessly praying is best…..for me….our groanings and our utterings have been my source of speak to God when I don’t know what to say.
Are you being really hard on yourself? or are you being convicted?

Barbara’s last blog post..Time

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One thing I don’t want to confuse is I know our relationship with God is the most important in our lives…

Just simply saying communication in any relationship is key..praying is our path to communicaiton..

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So, I’ve never commented to any of your posts. But, today I feel like I need to thank you…for this post, but especially for your message yesterday on prayer. I told my fiance tonight…”I don’t think I have ever prayed as much in one day as I have today”. And man does it feel good! What really helped me were the tangible examples that you showed as reminders to pray. When I approached it that way, the prayers just started flowing. So…thank you Pete!

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Some of the same things have been shared by others already, but I’ll go ahead and share too.

I go through stages where I’ll feel really close to the Lord and be very consistent in my prayer life, and then other times I let busyness and distractions get in the way and I slowly fade away.

Also, one of the same reasons I shared on Thursday: After praying for the same extremely important issues for years, I begin to get tired of waiting and develop a bad attitude. You have just made me realize this is where pride creeps in. Thanks for that, seriously.

I was also convicted Sunday when my pastor spoke on James 1:2-8, the testing of our faith developing perseverance, and how we should not doubt. I’m constantly needing to go back to basics. He is worthy to be praised!

Brenda’s last blog post..I’m not an idiot, but…

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I have to say for me prayer started as a discipline in preparation for a storm … God called me to relationship with Him and I answered that call having no idea what He had in store for me. Now, prayer is truly our conversation and it takes many forms. As I learn to know Him in different ways … as Daddy, as Husband, as Savior, as Friend, as Teacher … I pray differently. Sometimes I vent, sometimes I journal, sometimes I praise, sometimes …. I have found in journaling that I praise more and I hear more and as soon as I get all my stuff out, He swoops in with what He wants. And sometimes, I just sit and listen for His agenda.

I think of that book by Brother Lawrence, “The Practice of the Presence of God” … it is all about “cultivating the deep presence of God.” That’s what I want … 24/7. And, when the busyness of my day begins to steal my peace, then I know I haven’t been constantly talking to Daddy and asking His advice and opinion and seeking His face and solace and direction. Prayer … talking to God … keeps me in check and reminds me of Who is in control and Whose I am. That’s all that matters in the end. More of Him, less of me. It’s a discipline, a practice, a friendship. It requires making time and being conscious of Him all day. And, not listening to the “rules,” but developing your relationship, which is as unique as each person, with Him.

Thank you Pete for this post … and the reminder. Control is icky and, quite frankly, it’s an illusion we live by. Control isn’t truth. We aren’t in control and surrender equals joy … regardless of our circumstances.

Debra’s last blog post..10 Blessed Years!

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Pete and Everyone – thanks to all of you for your inspirations!

I’ve always had a daily “discussion board” with God… but just never really did so consciously… may be good or bad.

This post and all the comments created DESIRE within me to be more aware of my prayers…and as a result, I have started a prayer journal. I can’t wait to have written records of all the miracles God has and will do in our lives and of those around us.

Pete – this was initially prompted by your post last week where so many poured their hearts out requesting prayer. This post just clinched the deal for me. Thanks!

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thanks Paula

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