Words on the Soul
On Sunday we talked about the Power of Words.
Proverbs 15:4 The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.
There is an element of power in our words and it’s not accidental. Our Creator has shaped our hearts and souls to be impacted by the words of others. It’s part of your design.
I’m not even going to pretend to understand this spiritual principle but you certainly can’t ignore it. The words that come out of our mouth float through the air and land on souls impacting the course and direction of their life.
GOD HAS DESIGNED THE HUMAN SOUL WHERE YOUR WORDS WILL EITHER DESTROY OR BUILD UP ONE ANOTHER.
Knowing this I want to ask you: Who has God placed in your life and what do they need to hear you say.
Husbands what does your wife need to hear you say?
Wives what does your husband need to hear you say?
Parents what do your kids need to hear you say?
What do your employees, friends, neighbors need to hear you say?
EVERYONE needs healing and your words can bring the healing they so desperately need.
We ended the service with this awesome video Matt put together.
[vimeo http://www.vimeo.com/1954708]
So let’s hold each other accountable. Who needs to hear something from you? What do they need to hear?
I’ll go first. I need to tell Brandi (my wife) just how incredible she is as a mom. I love the way she interacts, entertains, teaches and loves our kids. She’s amazing. I love you babe.
My husband and I don’t have a problem telling each other what we need to hear, be it “you are my best friend,” and “I love you” to “you fell short of the mark this time, but I know you can fix it.”
But as parents I am pretty sure we spend too many of the ever-shortening hours with our kids telling them how they can improve themselves, and not enough time telling them they are also wonderful and beautiful and perfect just the way they are. So I guess that’s what I need to spend more time saying!
I could do a much better job of telling Cindy and the kids how important they are to me, but I could also do a much better job of keeping my big opinionated mouth shut at times.
Here’s a guestion. For those of us who are blogaholics, wouldn’t the same principle apply to the barbs we throw around online?
I’m glad that CrossPoint took a positive take on the “Say” video. I’ve seen a number of other projects (there is a book out right now where the author asked people to send in post cards with their secrets on it. He was at Vanderbilt last week – the PostSecret project by Frank Warren).
Anyway, I thumbed through the book at the bookstore and the cards were downright depressing. The one I remember was “I’m waiting for him to do one major thing so I can file for divorce.”
My heart absolutely broke for those people. They see no way out, feel they have no one to admit the deep things of their heart to without judgment or reprisals… so they send it in to a guy via postcard. I don’t know that woman’s story… maybe she has tried to work on her marriage… but my gut instinct told me no.
Maybe all of the cards weren’t that down, but it says something about the state of our lives and our culture where we mask the deep hurts, dreams, desires out of fear.
I need to call my brother and sister in law and tell them how much I love them and how awesome they are.
I need to tell my wife how much I love and appreicate her!
I need to tell my children that I think they are the greatest and they can do anything they dream.
Pete,
Love the video! Well done!
there are several things that i need to hear right now.
~ from my employer (you are appreciated and worth more then what we are paying you)
~ from my pastor (the youth pastor that i serve with) i see you going through something i see you are in a major :in between phase: and it does not make sense, but I see God moving and it will be ok.
~ from :the boy: its gonna take me a while, but I have heard from God and i am in the same place you are. this is our future, and i love it!!! just be patient.
but i struggle with letting God say those things to my heart first. am i trusting what he is doing?
if i am not, then people could say :stuff: to me all day, but it will not satisfy. i will question and want more.
that is where i am at.
that is what i need to hear.
and i pray my heart is open to God speaking to me and loving me.
I really love this video. It’s amazing how we can get so caught up in waiting for people to say what we need and want to hear, but fail to tell others what they need to hear. It’s such a selfless act and can really change the course of a person’s day. Thank you for the wonderful post and video!
I need to say “Ken, I love you …. I believe in you ….I believe in us ….. I need to be more positive and loving and I am working on it!!”
hmm. My husband needs to hear “I forgive you.” I need to hear “I’ll get help.”
In counseling people struggling with their marriages, I teach them about wall words VS bridge words. Wall words shut people out and insulate our hearts. Bridge words extend healing and allow others into who we really are. Powerful tool, the tongue! Tame our tongues, God!
@Beth Taylor, I like that!
Pete,
I’m already rehearsing and speaking “you’ve got what it takes” for daughters and sons-in-law, so thanks for the nudge.
Oh, and if you need a favorite obscure music group, mention the Stomp Bunnies, guaranteed to get a variety of reactions from anyone.
Wow…I was running through my day and paused to look over some of my favorite blogs and now I’m sobbing…thank you for this, the blog and the video. Powerful.
I’m calling my dad~
Shoot, I didn’t realize Matt put that together! I just assumed it was from John Mayer’s music video. That Matt is so amazing!
We so enjoyed stopping in Nashville and being with everyone at Cross Point this past Sunday.
Here’s some of the things I need to say:
Pete – Thanks for being an inspiration to me and setting such an awesome example as a blogger, pastor, husband, father, and friend. I really mean that. God has such amazing things in store for you – this is only the beginning.
My wife – Lisa, I’m so glad that you’ve decided to embark on this crazy church-planting journey with me. I respect you so much for standing by me and always encouraging me.
My Fort Wayne friends – Thank you so much for constantly speaking words of encouragement to me and visiting us down here in Indy. It means so much to us.
The blogging community (all of you) – I don’t know where I’d be this year without all the support and inspiration I’ve received from all of you. God has brought so many amazing relationships into our lives through the blog. Your comments, emails and chats brighten my day and help me to keep pressing on.
i think my husband needs to hear THANK YOU for giving me the opportunity to be stay-at-home mom! i do consider it a gift. you’re the best!!
@bradruggles, thanks bro. You’re friendship means a lot to me.
@brandiandboys, Thanks babe.
I can’t tell you all how much I appreciate the community you are forming here. I’m having a blast.
This is powerful! I have certainly become more aware of the power of my own words over the last couple of years. My toungue can be used to damage and tear people down, or it can be used to build them up. I have been doing my best to use my toungue to do the later. I find it works
Pete, this video absolutely blew me away on Sunday. I think I went through three tissues just thinking about all the things I need to say to the people in my lifeboat. The one that is heavy on my heart right now is for my mom. She and I went through some things last year that put some distance between us and ever since it’s been hard just to say “I love you.” Taking a trip home this weekend to see my folks, and praying I’ll have the opportunity (and the courage) to do just that.
@Lillian… I’ll say prayers for you too, and hope that helps give you courage. So often too much time is wasted on missed opportunities with family.
I really do believe that everyone we encounter we either leave feeling better about themselves or worse, but they are never unaffected. I know I have certainly been affected by all of you and the community here. Thank you for helping me to feel “out in the world” again rather than trapped in my home. You all affect me every day.
Individuals needed to hear thank you for praying specific prayers for my hubby and our family. And that they are being TODAY! I just posted that thank you on my blog.
Sara – You were just prayed for! As one who was homebound/hospital for 5 years straight… I can understand a bit of where you are coming from. Thank you for posting your thoughts today here…
(Pete… pray for you/yours daily and thank you too.)
I love my wife more than I will ever be able to tell her, but I will tell her that every day.
Great post, Pete… and another stellar video from Matt! You guys are great!
wow. i must be the biggest cry baby on earth – ’cause this video just broke me down. can’t believe i’m going to say this…
…April (2007) – I was terminated as an employee of my church, one I served, worked, and worshipped at for over 12 years.
despite the pain of that moment, i can say (with confidence) that with Christ, there is indeed life after death.
i know of several hundred people who have been waiting for me to say that. that elephant has been in my room for some time.
thanks pete.
AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME!!!! You have just deeply blessed this girl today. I’ll pass along the right words to the right people this week. Thank you. Blessings~
Great video and insight (“GOD HAS DESIGNED THE HUMAN SOUL WHERE YOUR WORDS WILL EITHER DESTROY OR BUILD UP ONE ANOTHER”).
Keep up the GREAT work. Hope to visit Cross Point when I make a trip to Tennessee in February.
@Milan, Bro that took guts!
@Pat Callahan, I saw your picture on the inside of the new Seth Godin book entitled “Tribes”.
that video is incredible. you’re all such incredible people.
i have so much to say to all of you here.
you show me God in ways I was never looking for him. You’ve opened my eyes and my heart and i’m a stronger, better, more trusting person for it.
James is probably one my favorite NT writers, and chapter 3 has a great discussion about the tongue. A small flame that can start great fires. My wife knows I love her, but I need to tell her that I do like talking with her.
My sons do need to hear when I correct them, but they also need to hear that I love them and I’m glad God brought them into our lives. I sometimes do the former much more “passionately” than the latter. I need to sometimes just let the correction go and focus on the “it’s OK, I love you.” And they need to hear it in the tone as well as in the words.
Pete, you prayed with me about my son a couple of weeks ago and things have been wonderful.
Pete.. that video was so great.
I need to tell my wife she is still the most beautiful woman in my life… and that I am in awe of her and how much she handles on a daily basis with both kids. She is the strongest person I know.
Sometime last year I wrote this…
http://mysoul.wordpress.com/2007/08/17/power-of-words/
I notice that its the things that the others, especially the ones who you live with most of your life, really want to hear that we rarely say out loud… its Irony isnt it? I never mentioned to my Parents How grateful I am for the way they were with me while I was younger..Somehow the “Right” time never came about. Now I think I should call them and let them know.
my father probably needs to hear “I forgive you”……..but i don’t yet
Pete–I’ve been reading your blog for several months now, but this is the first time I’ve posted a comment. I know you hear this from many people, but I just wanted to say Thank You for being such a great Pastor. My husband and I attended Cross Point for about 2 1/2 years before moving to SC a year ago. You inspired us then and you still inspire us now–through your blog and through your sermons online–to be serve God more sincerely, to love others more completely, to be a better spouse, to be a better parent, and to simply be a better Christian. I regret that I didn’t tell you when I was attending your church how greatly you have impacted my life and marriage, and many of the relationships I have. Thanks Pete.
@Leila L., Thank you so much. You have no idea how much that means to me.
We are “newbies” to your website, and can testify to the power of encouraging words– we are in So. Illinois and have been so encouraged by your words in your messages and blogs- we can’t get enough! Each message is always a call to ACTION, not just to say, “What a great ‘sermon’” but the words are penetrating our hearts and empowering us to change-heal-help. Life is short-choose your words carefully!
My husband needs to hear “I believe in you” and “I appreciate you”. My kids need to hear “I think you’re terrific”. We all need to hear less sarcasm.
Thanks, Pete, for such a great message on Sunday – has the potential to change so many lives if we just put the principle into practice. And thanks, Matt, for such a powerful video – brought tears to my eyes.
Both my husband and my children need to hear an apology for the times that I’ve hurt them with my words. And then, my husband needs to hear that I respect him, and my kids need to hear that they are God’s greatest gifts to me and that I am SO glad he chose me to be their mom. Great video, Pete, and great thoughts on the power of our words. Thanks!
I need to stop. Slow down. Tell friends how much I appreciate them. It is so easy to get lost in the grind of life.
Pete – killer post. I was reading a Thomas Kempis book, The Inner Life, and one of the entries about the use of words and the tongue. I’ve taken on the practice of making sure that each word that I say has meaning. Your post couldn’t have been more timely.
Words are so powerful. People don’t truly believe that words are that powerful.