Why I don’t Have A Cat

This past week I was talking about the power of words and used the scripture in James that says… “All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been teamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue…”

I went on to jokingly say that I think you can tame all animals except for cats.  I’m not sure if you can train a cat. In between services, my friend Bob, who often volunteers at the Cross Point Resource table shared this story with me.

I had this cat that kept pooping in the house. I was told that if you rubbed the cats nose in the poop that would teach the cat to use the bathroom outside. So every time the cat pooped I would rub her nose in it and then toss her out the window. I did this over and over and over.

Eventually the cat thought it was a game and everytime she would poop in the house she would rub her own nose in it and then jump out the window.

That is why I don’t have a cat.

withoutwax,

pete

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47 Responses to “Why I don’t Have A Cat”

  1. sara October 13, 2008 at 1:15 pm #

    And the people say, “Amen!”

    (Says the girl whose dog trained her to obey… not the other way around.)

  2. Cindy October 13, 2008 at 1:23 pm #

    Pete, is it a control thing? You don’t like cats because you can’t get it to do what you want?? I have two cats and a bunny, so no cat bashing from me. You don’t know what you are missing. Ever thought that God put them here to teach US something not the other way around? I love dogs too, but there is nothing like a purring cat when you are petting on it. :)

  3. ally October 13, 2008 at 1:25 pm #

    I would say cats were absolutely worthless….but they do seem to bring some people (myself not included) joy. Of course, that is their only (very limited) utility:)

  4. Pete Wilson October 13, 2008 at 1:34 pm #

    @Cindy, yes it’s probably a control thing. :) I’m just kidding I like cats. I don’t personally want one but my very first pet was a gray cat named Smoky. She would actually fetch a little plastic ball.

    When she died I buried her in my grandfather’s garden. To this day he get some yummy strawberries from that spot.

  5. godzgaljen October 13, 2008 at 1:40 pm #

    I think that is the funniest story I’ve heard in a while! I don’t like cats either….they scare me. They pounce….chase your feet…they just freak me out!

  6. patrowland October 13, 2008 at 1:41 pm #

    Let me get this straight… The cat poops, rubs it face in it, then jumps out a window… Yeah Cats are so smart!

  7. Clayton Bell October 13, 2008 at 1:42 pm #

    Why do you need a reason to not like cats? Their CATS!

    Did you know that serpent is commonly mis-translated in Genesis? The original Hebrew translates to CAT…

  8. carrie-anne October 13, 2008 at 1:53 pm #

    cats certainly aren’t dogs! i mean they are not evil, but ours live entirely outside because they peed on everything and i’ve had to replace a couch, chair, an entertainment center and numerous boxes of what-nots because they woud pee on them. i like ‘em but they ain’t living in my house. my dogs are more cuddley than the cats ever were. nothing like a dog

  9. ncarnes October 13, 2008 at 2:16 pm #

    Cats are the spawn of Satan!

  10. dewde October 13, 2008 at 2:19 pm #

    LOLOL!!!

    Cats rule. You can tame them, and even train them. I trained my cat to “sit” and “shake paws” with me.

    peace|dewde
    http://dewde.com

  11. brandiandboys October 13, 2008 at 2:25 pm #

    it is not nice to pick on cat people… cat people know cool people, like seth godin.

    besides, your wife is allergic! :)

  12. Mark October 13, 2008 at 2:33 pm #

    Dogs say “You feed me, you talk me, you love me – You must be God.” Cats say “You feed me, you talk to me, you love me – I must be God.”

  13. anna October 13, 2008 at 2:37 pm #

    “To this day he get some yummy strawberries from that spot.”
    I nearly pissed myself…hilarious.

  14. eblack October 13, 2008 at 2:38 pm #

    i’m allergic…. but i think even i wasn’t… cats would be creepy.

  15. ncarnes October 13, 2008 at 2:40 pm #

    The only good cat is a dead one.

  16. Morgan October 13, 2008 at 3:06 pm #

    that and the fact that cats are from the devil.

  17. Starwoodgal October 13, 2008 at 3:33 pm #

    This made me giggle! We’re SO Dog people (we own three HUGE dogs).

    I could never have a cat. First, my dogs would kill the cat.
    Second: hubby said “Cats are weird. They are independent and could careless if you’re there or not and they won’t do anything you tell them to do.”

    I just looked at him and said “Meow!” :)

    (kidding)

  18. Cindy October 13, 2008 at 3:42 pm #

    No, @ncarnes, that is a snake…the only good snake is a dead one!!! :)

  19. Pete Wilson October 13, 2008 at 3:46 pm #

    @Cindy, I agree. I hate snakes much more than cats!

  20. Christina Schmidt October 13, 2008 at 3:57 pm #

    I’m so with ncarnes…my dad would say cats belong on the tread of tires! I lived with 4 of the little beasts, and they are too independent and if they could, they would rule the world, killing all humankind! EVIL!!

  21. Becky October 13, 2008 at 3:58 pm #

    That story is hilarious.
    I am not a cat person…however I do have a cat.
    I killed his mother when he was about 4 weeks old & felt sorry for him.
    He now resides outside of my house and we both like it much better that way.

  22. Jan Connair October 13, 2008 at 4:23 pm #

    This is Jan Connair of the Cat Anti-Defamation League, and I must object to your post. And perhaps perform a citizen’s arrest!

    Can you tell I am a “cat person”? I have rarely met a dog I truly like (three in total, actually–don’t hate me). Dogs drool! When you walk them, you have to pick their poop up with your almost-bare hands and carry it around with you in a baggie! They eat more. They don’t purr. I could go on.

    Besides, I once had a cat who was ultra cool. His name was Stick. He spent the day outside, but when we wanted him to come back into the house, all we had to do was stand at the back door and whistle a certain little signal, and he would turn up within a minute or two. Worked every time.

    Had another cat who loved the song, “Moon River.” Whenever I was doing my mandatory piano practicing, if I would begin that tune, he would amble over, curl up on the piano, and begin to purr. I don’t know if that counts as being trained, but it definitely made him special.

    So don’t knock cats. They know how to work the system to their advantage, but give a little when they think it makes their family happy! ;-)

  23. April October 13, 2008 at 4:44 pm #

    Just wondering if this is going to be the new series, a la “why i had kids”

  24. jalack October 13, 2008 at 5:13 pm #

    Satan’s hand puppets. Untrainable. I heard this one guy tell a story about how much he loved his cat. This guy loved his cat so nuch that he would put it on a leash and take it for a drag around his neighborhood. Freakin cats….

  25. carrie-anne October 13, 2008 at 6:22 pm #

    cat’s aren’t my fav, but c’mon peeps…they’re not the spawn of satan!

  26. Christina Schmidt October 13, 2008 at 6:35 pm #

    @Becky, we have something in common, I’ve been deemed a cat killer, although the death of the cat cannot be confirmed, he just got out one night, and never returned! Oh well, I’m sure he’s MUCH happier wherever he is now, my old roommate wasn’t a good cat owner, or so I think, and our apartment was flea infested. I’ve learned I can no longer live with the little devils!

  27. Christina Schmidt October 13, 2008 at 6:36 pm #

    and let me clarify, I DID NOT let the cat out on purpose!

  28. Pete Wilson October 13, 2008 at 6:41 pm #

    @April, I hadn’t thought of that. Good idea.

  29. Archie October 13, 2008 at 8:27 pm #

    Cats taste like chicken….

    • vero February 17, 2010 at 10:19 am #

      and you like shit

  30. sara October 13, 2008 at 9:33 pm #

    Ooooh, Archie… that ain’t right!
    :)

  31. Simone October 13, 2008 at 10:05 pm #

    Just found out our son is allergic to cats. It was all I could do not to kiss the doctor. I then begged – literally – begged the doctor to tell me he is also allergic to dogs. I love dogs, but don’t want to care for another one until the kids are out of the house.

  32. Jonnelle October 13, 2008 at 10:14 pm #

    Smith and Wesson would disagree with all you haters.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/pink_kitty/202962756/in/set-72057594074056726/

  33. caringsoul October 13, 2008 at 10:46 pm #

    I don’t blame you as far as not wanting a cat. I myself don’t want a cat either.

  34. Becky October 13, 2008 at 11:22 pm #

    @christina schmidt I ran over his mother…not on purpose. He sat on the side of the road & cried…darn him for making me feel guilty. I should have known from the start he was going to be trouble.

  35. brent(inWorship) October 13, 2008 at 11:35 pm #

    I tried this with my kids and they did the same thing…

  36. ryan guard October 14, 2008 at 12:09 am #

    hahaha!

    I had to read this one out loud to my wife… funny stuff

  37. tam October 14, 2008 at 1:33 am #

    i ran over a black cat last year. on Halloween! i killed it.

    oops.

  38. James Taylor October 14, 2008 at 1:43 am #

    my cats are more like speed bumps in my kitchen. Coco weighing @ 32 lbs and BJ weighing @ 22 lbs.

    OK…who has the fattest cat?

  39. Joshua Scott October 14, 2008 at 8:35 am #

    hilarious!

  40. Rob October 14, 2008 at 9:04 am #

    I’m much more of a dog person but I would have loved to see that!

  41. Cherith October 14, 2008 at 9:40 am #

    Hi Pete! This is Cherith. I met you last sunday with Brad and Lisa Ruggles. Any who… This is so funny. I have a cat with a huge personality. I have to tell you she is stubborn. But Crazy at the same time. Thanks for the great story, I’m sure my husband will appreciate this.

  42. ncarnes October 14, 2008 at 9:44 am #

    Cats are also a good substitute for chicken in Chinese food. That’s really the only time I really love a cat.

  43. Brandy October 14, 2008 at 10:02 am #

    ditto that! Cats are evil. :lol:

  44. Jane October 18, 2008 at 7:35 pm #

    Cat abusers.

  45. Billy G. York May 1, 2010 at 7:09 pm #

    Thanks for the encouragement that you gave me when I first started on wordpress. As for that cat thing, the reason I don’t have one is if it pooped on the floor, my wife would rub my nose in it and throw me out the window.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks:

  1. brent(inWorship) » Blog Archive » A Little Bit of This…A Little bit of That… - October 15, 2008

    [...] -My buddy Pete, hates cats. He’s got a funny story on his blog about it. [...]